10 Lies You Need To Stop Telling Yourself In Your 20s


1. I will stop spending my money on dumb things.

See that new style everyone’s wearing? How about that current blockbuster film? Or that chic restaurant down the block? Right. You can kiss your money goodbye again. This is what your impulse buying behavior does to you. Once you’ve heard something everyone’s going crazy for, you almost always want to check it out. No wonder you’re broke. But here’s a simple trick that will help you save a lot of cash and time in the long run: stick to an affordable lifestyle that best represents you. Give yourself a break from following the trend. It will only keep you running in the same circle and disallow you to create an original identity that will stand out.

2. I will have a breakthrough in my career by this age.

Maybe you will. Maybe you won’t. But one thing is certain — you don’t have the power to know when exactly you’ll be successful. Stop putting weird imaginary deadlines in your life. Because trust me, 99% of the time, you’ll end up with a heartbreak. Schedules are fine. Keeping track of your improvements are good indicators for you to see how much you’ve progressed. But creating a timetable and convincing yourself that you need to adhere to it all the freaking time will surely lead you to a series of disappointments.

3. I need to work hard to prove myself.

I’m sorry, prove yourself for who? Also, why do you have to work hard just so you have something to add in a conversation? Build yourself for yourself. Respect from people will come in your way once they see that you’re doing well. Constantly trying to earn salute from them will give you the wrong impression of what success really means. Go out there and pursue what you like in this world. But do it because your heart wants to get it. Not because everyone around you says you should.

4. If I act a certain way, someone will fall in love with me.

I mean, that’s partially true. But they will fall in love with the version of yourself who is not you. And unless you want to spend the rest of your life pretending, you really don’t have to curate a persona different from who you really are just so they can accept you. It’s not that hard to be comfortable in your skin. If people aren’t okay with how you look like on the outside, you shouldn’t be spending your time with them. It’s not your fault you were born that way.

5. My one true love will come in my life while I sit here.

Hate to say this, but your forever person will not fall from sky. For you to get a relationship, or anything closer to that, you will be needing some dating skills. You can’t wait under the comforts of your home for someone to ask for you hands. You have to risk your heart. It’s going to be frightening and awkward and dirty and earth-shattering, but damn worth it. Because that’s what love is, it’s painful sometimes, but worth the risk. You have the choice whether you want to play safe in love and feel nothing or play with fire and feel everything.

6. I’m going to get more sleep this weekend.

You promise to yourself you’ll make up for the nights you stayed past your bedtime, until you get a text from your friend on a Friday night. Next thing you know, you’re coming home late and knowing all too well that you won’t be getting quality sleep. This is a cycle of breaking promises week after week. There’s nothing new about it. You’re young. You want to have some fun. But enjoying your youth doesn’t have to compromise your health. Sleep is necessary. And you’re aware of this. So stop lying to yourself that you don’t need it.

7. I think I have to start acting like an adult.

Actually, you can skip the acting part and be like an adult. You have a responsibility for yourself. And just in case you haven’t heard it a billion of times, let me remind you — life is a gift. Do you know how many people die young and wish to have extra days? While you’re standing there taking each breath for granted? Give your emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual health the care that they deserve. And quit making excuses about why you keep messing your life up. That’s how you start to become an actual adult.

8. I will pay attention to those that really matter.

Sure you do. But smartphones get in the way. Bummer, right? I don’t know if it’s just us, but my friends and I don’t pull out our phones that much whenever we’re together. I guess we just want to have great times and create memories that we want to remember someday without the use of photographs. I totally understand how difficult it is to avoid the internet. But think about it this way: it’s infinitely better to be talking to a person face to face and seeing their facial reactions than only getting an idea of them behind their screens and emoticons. You would rather be living inside the wallpapers that you see online than staring at them through your phone.

9. I swear I’ll never go back to online dating.

How many times have you deleted and re-downloaded your dating apps? If it’s embarrassing for you to answer, I’ll tell you mine — eleven times. I know it’s tempting, especially when you’re lonely. Which should actually be enough reason for you to refrain yourself from installing it on your mobile again! Online dating is a joke somebody told you is funny, but really is not. Pretty much everyone there wants to get laid and it’s just, I don’t know, pathetic? Not sure. Not really into that thing.

10. I want a good challenge.

You make a public announcement that you want to grow and are up for a good challenge. But when someone, who cares about your so called growth, shows you the mountain and asks you to climb it, you complain and get mad at them. Don’t be the kind of human being who barks but doesn’t bite. Your words are your honor. If you really want to grow, be ready for a fight. If you want to be a true soldier, be willing to punch and spit some blood. This decade of your life isn’t going to be a walk in the park. But once you become so good in dealing with adversaries, you’ll come out on the other side stronger and more equipped to face more difficult battles.