10 Ways A Little Distance Goes A Long Way In A Relationship


1. You gain independence.

When it’s just you, it’s just you. And some time apart services self-affirmation (and breathing) a great deal. And ultimately, you-time well spent translates to the-two-of-you-time well spent; it’s good to invest in (and prioritize) me, if only because it’ll make you a stronger us.

2. Theoretically, you care less about how you look.

…Which, ironically, leads you to want to look better than fucking ever, because you’re finally unattainable. Which is sweet. And when you look good, fuck, you feel good (confidence is virtue). And when you feel good, your relationship prospers. Whoa.

3. You get to know yourself better.

Often in relationships, you get so used to doing things as two that you lose touch with what you’d want, do, think, feel…if you were on your own. Not that your time together excludes moments of self-discovery—you learn a lot about you when you’re with him. But alone time certainly aids the process.

4. …In the biblical sense.

You def make time to feel yourself up when he’s around, to be clear…but when he’s not around…well, you’re left to pleasure you. And some extended you-on-you lovin’ is inevitably useful in learning what you want when you’re with him. Which is good for both of you. Lots of yous flyin’ around…bear with me.

5. Your nights always end well.

Sure, you miss him, but you’re always comforted by the fact that, even when you end your night alone, you’re never like, alone. No sad, melodramatic, super-lonely nights haunted by the fear that your may remain involuntarily celibate for the rest of your life.

6. You learn not to take your virtual interactions for granted.

You savor every text, every FaceTime…every little iInteraction you get with him, you low-key treasure. When you don’t get to see his face or touch his skin, “hi what’s up” gives you a lot more than it used to.

7. …And your in-person interactions more still.

After days, weeks, or months of not seeing him, you’re determined to squeeze every ounce of joy from those precious moments you do get to see him. And even when he inevitably pisses you off, you try (harder than usual, at least) to avoid arguing. (Flip side, tho: if he pisses you off enough to start a fight, you’ll double-resent the both of you for squandering your time together. Which can be stressful.)

8. Speaking of fights though, generally, they’re fewer and further between.

Fewer instances of real face time = fewer opportunities to read between the stupid, snarky, annoying lines of his tell-all face. People are the worst. Including, sometimes, him. And you. But when you’re apart, you tend to focus on the goodness.

9. You miss him for all the reasons you love him.

With some time to think, visualize, remember…you stumble upon all the stuff that made you ~fall~ for him, and you miss him and love him a little more for every single stuff, twice over.

10. …And find a hundred new things you never realized you loved him for.

With some more time to think, visualize, remember…you start to put all his weird stuffs together and discover a host of stuffs you never really thought to love him for.