14 Life Lessons I Learned From My Mother

Life sucks and then you die. My mother has said this on many occasions, and honestly, it’s true. It’s almost comforting, in a morbid way. Kind of like the inspirational this too shall pass, but for cynics.

Take your time while applying your mascara, otherwise, you will probably hurt yourself, and walk away from the mirror looking like a drowned raccoon.

Open doors slowly while entering the room. Don’t just barge in. Otherwise, the door might end up taking someone’s toenail with it.

A woman isn’t defined by her cooking skills. So what, you have yet to master the art of cooking food without setting off the smoke alarm. Big deal. If anyone notices or feels the need to point out your lack of talent in the kitchen, let them choke on your dry ass chicken. Karma, bitch.

Work hard. Even when your coworkers are lazy, stay true to yourself and your own work ethic, and keep pushing yourself to do the best you can. Don’t use other people’s carelessness as an excuse to slack off.

Don’t ever depend on another human being to take care of you and your family. Even when that other human being is your husband, who should be responsible for carrying his own weight. Sometimes, as a wife and mother, you will have to carry him, too. It isn’t right. It isn’t fair. But it is a reality of some marriages that you should prepare yourself for. It is possible to be a single mother, despite that ring on your finger and your husband’s physical presence in the household.

Be kind to flowers. Calling them assholes while planting them isn’t going to help them grow. The same goes for children.

Don’t let your anxiety win. You will absolutely have your days where the world is too much, and you will probably fight with your anxiety every morning before you leave the house. But 9.5 times out of 10, you will win. When your anxiety pushes you, you will learn to push right back and overcome any bullshit it tries to convince you of. You will find a way to keep going. You will realize that you are stronger than the invasive thoughts or impending panic attacks.

Love and sacrifice often go hand-in-hand. Food and sleep are often a luxury when you are struggling to make ends meet and ensure that your children are fed and taken care of. While love isn’t measured by what you are willing to sacrifice, giving up some of the things that you want or need is often a consequence of loving someone else. Especially your kids.

Love them anyway. Your kids are human beings. They are going to fuck up. Sometimes really badly, and consistently over a long period of time. Love them anyway.

Be patient. Your kids might make fun of you and your wardrobe throughout their teenage years, but about a decade down the road, they will be raiding your closet and complimenting your “vintage” style. It’s just the weird circle of life.

Talent comes in many forms. Sometimes, talent isn’t defined by how well you work with your hands, but rather by how well you use your heart. Not everyone is gifted when it comes to working with kids. Not everyone has the patience. The ability to nurture, encourage, and comfort children truly is a virtue. Too bad it isn’t a trait that is genetically passed down (there will be no grandchildren from me, sorry).

Life is gross, but that doesn’t mean your feet have to be. Paint your damn toenails. It makes your feet look nicer and gives off the impression that you actually care about yourself. The right shade of nail polish has the potential to mask the fact that the rest of your life is falling apart.

“Mom” is a name that is earned. Being someone’s mother is more than just the act of giving birth to another human being. It is a commitment. When you bring a life into this world, it is your obligation to protect it. In doing so, you also realize that you owe it to your child to be the best version of yourself so that you can raise your child to be the best version of themselves. This includes taking care of your health and staying away from drugs an alcohol. Growing up, so many of my friends had moms who struggled with addiction and were negligent to their responsibilities as a mother. It wasn’t until my late teens that I realized how blessed I was to have such a dedicated mother. I am extremely thankful.