15 Things Not to Mention on Your Kickstarter Page
Kickstarter has proven to be a promising tool for those looking to get funding for their creative projects. Just be sure to avoid mentioning the following when you create your project page:
- “The working title of my new memoir is ‘Rape, Rape and Just a Touch of Rape: How I Raped My Way to Financial Mega-Success.’”
- “Bottom line: I will do anything for $20.”
- “I am fairly confident that, once I raise enough money to get these calf implants, I’ll be ready to open my small organic bakery.”
- “I require pledges of various monetary donations with which I shall finance my ‘creative project’ involving art, comics, dance, fashion, film, food, games, music, photography, technology and/or theater.”
- “I’m an old friend of your dad’s, and he said that if I ever got into trouble I could count on you for help.”
- “If my project gets funded, it will be the first time anyone has ever reenacted the Rwanda genocide using the fresh corpses of purebred Friesian Sporthorses!”
- “Pledge $1 or more and I’ll send you an autographed collection of my ‘Top Chef’ graphic adult fanfiction (NSFW).”
- “ZOMG I’M GOING TO MAKE LIKE THE BEST COFFEE TABLE BOOK OF FOOT PHOTOGRAPHY EVER!!!”
- “Honestly, I just need enough money so that I don’t have to worry about anything, ever again.”
- “Our album is going to sound kind of like Radiohead, but way funkier and with only conga drums.”
- “Pledge $5,000 and I’ll send you a copy of my latest book, ‘Decision Points.’”
- “If you do not have a PayPal account, I also accept pledges in the form of black tar heroin.”
- “Our communal kitchen would promote food literacy, economic sustainability and the purity of the Aryan race.”
- “Pledge $100, and I’ll let you squeeze one of my new calf implants.”
- “Anyone have any good ideas for what kind of project I should start?”