15 Ways We Sell Ourselves Short


1. Tying ourselves down because we feel like that’s what’s expected from some people. Honestly, who cares what they’re going to say at the family picnic, they’ll probably be making remarks about your life no matter what you choose to do.

2. Not settling down because we feel like that’s what’s expected from other people. (Life is a conundrum). People will tell you to go and “live your life” before you commit to someone, but you can most definitely do both if you want.

3. Not dating other people for the fear of rejection. It’s the oldest excuse in the book, and the silliest, although it feels the most real. You will never know if you never try. Beyond that, every person it doesn’t work out with brings you that much closer to someone with whom it will.

4. Thinking on a granular level. We just have to ease up on ourselves sometimes and realize that analyzing every detail won’t ever change the outcome, it will just drive us mad. Don’t waste your time doing this, there are far better things to occupy your mind with. Beyond that, consider things in the big picture, most likely, whatever is plaguing you now won’t be an issue a little while down the line.

5. Getting stuck on one person because we’re convinced nobody else will love us. I feel as though that’s the running but highly ignored trend in the “why I can’t get over so-and-so” saga. It is most often because we think we will never find somebody else who loves us as that person does. Or we don’t want to start over. Or we don’t want to be alone… blah, blah, blah. Stop holding onto your irrational fears and get the hell out there and find someone who loves you to pieces.

6. Holding grudges from the woes of our adolescence. You would be surprised at how applicable this would be to many people’s lives– actually, no, you probably wouldn’t be surprised. It’s time to move on though. Cut people slack for the stupid things they did or did to you in youth.

7. Neglecting medical needs. You can only put these things off for so long, and usually, by the time you do get to them, it’s either too late or serious damage has been caused. Just take care of yourself. You’re not invincible and nobody expects you to be.

8. Thinking failing once means its time to stop trying. Reality: giving up is the only guaranteed way to fail.

9. Not listening to the advice of others (especially those who are older) because we think we know better. You don’t have to take the advice, but you never know when someone could be offering up an invaluable life truth that could really help you out. Just don’t let it pass you.

10. Underestimating the importance of being truly, genuinely healthy and not under the guise of wanting to be thin. This too will catch up with you. Develop a lifestyle that works for you and let it be the foundation for a long, healthy life.

11. Settling for half-assed friendships. If we’re not guilty of it ourselves, we all know someone who does nothing but complain about their friends, and it has to make you stop and wonder, why not just… move on? I’m not sure what we hold onto in this regard, but either way, you are depriving yourself of a much more enjoyable decade by spending it with people you don’t really like.

12. Not growing out of negative self-talk. Well, let’s be honest here, do we ever grow out of it entirely? Probably not, and I think that’s normal. But at least know that its irrational and that you are a-okay the way you are.

13. Believing that we’ll be okay one day, once we have that [one thing]. Everybody is waiting for their lives to start: for the promotion, raise, partner, child, I could go on. You will be waiting forever if you are in the mindset that you can only be happy once you have something, because that something will turn into another something, and so on.

14. Not realizing the consequences of being unnecessarily cruel to people. It’s time to realize how much people can be affected by the negative things they are told about themselves or that they hear about themselves– and then to act on that realization.

15. Thinking that this is the end of the good times. This is just the beginning. It’s only the end if you say so.

Buy Brianna’s new Thought Catalog book here.

Want to get invited to exclusive private parties where you live? Thought Catalog can arrange that. Sign up here.

image – Paul Stevenson