16 Things People Don’t Realize You’re Doing Because You Have ‘Oppositional Defiance Disorder’


1. You don’t accept rules that don’t make sense to you.

You don’t obey any rules – save for, of course, legal ones – that don’t inherently make sense to you. (Something being a law makes enough sense for you to respect it, even if you dislike it.) As a kid, you probably struggled with not listening to your parents because you disagreed with what they were saying. The whole concept of following anything blindly never sat well with you.

2. You reject doing anything because you’re “supposed to.”

You do things because they feel right and make sense to you. You don’t get married, have a child, or commit to a career that you know is the wrong choice for you because the comfort of other people’s approval seems like the only thing that matters.

3. You can be somewhat of a devil’s advocate at times, but it’s only to consider all sides of a situation.

You’re the kind of person who could be a staunch Democrat, but who will watch extremely right-sided shows or read Republican articles just to see what the other side is saying, and to understand their point of view. You’re also not afraid to speak out if and when you agree with something that’s not “on your side.” You see more broadly than that.

4. You can be painfully indecisive.

You’re very good at seeing both sides of any given situation, and sometimes this hurts you more than it helps. You can find yourself truly frustrated at the fact that you can’t decide what to do, or who to be with, depending on the situation you’re in. You have to learn to prioritize your needs, ultimately.

5. You’re not afraid to have ideas that aren’t “politically correct.”

You’re not afraid to call out the mob for being what they are. You’re not afraid to stand against the group or talk about something that people say is “off-limits,” or point out hypocrisy where it exists. Everything is layered. No opinion or stance or belief exists in black or white.

6. You can become easily annoyed by others.

It’s not that you’re a mean or angry person, but that you hold people to a very high expectation, and when they fall short of that, it becomes frustrating, if not at times unbearable. For this reason, you tend to keep your inner circle small.

7. You strongly dislike being told what to do.

This can sometimes lead to being unproductive, or unnecessarily argumentative. Even if the rules or requests are in your best interest, you just don’t like being controlled in any way.

8. You do not subscribe to any beliefs that induce “fear.”

Anytime you hear a religion or philosophy telling people to fear God or anything else, you immediately have a reaction to it, because it feels as though you’re being told to stay small and afraid and controlled. You only believe in ideas that help you become the best version of yourself for yourself, not for someone else’s idea of what’s “right” or “wrong.”

9. You like to feel like you’re getting away with something.

When it manifests healthfully, this can mean you like getting a great sale on some clothes you needed, or being able to work from home so you can sleep in an hour late, or being privy to information before somebody else is. It goes without saying that this desire can become negative when it’s applied to something destructive.

10. You don’t like to be wrong.

If you’re being completely honest with yourself, you like to find other reasons or people to blame for your troubles. You don’t like having to admit that you weren’t right (it feels like surrendering control, or as though you can’t trust yourself).

11. You are a natural-born leader.

A main reason for this is that you’re hyper-sensitive to the ways that people dislike feeling controlled, or as though they’re being taken advantage of. Because of this, you can have a natural empathy about you, and lead in a way that makes people feel respected and autonomous.

12. You can sometimes be very emotional.

Not everyone with ODD is this way, but a lot of the behaviors of ODD stem from wanting to maintain control. Another symptom of feeling like one is “losing control” is fearing the emotions that would come with that loss.

13. You’re skeptical of authority.

You have a very hard time believing that major organizations and corporations have your best interest at heart, and aren’t afraid to point out when they’re being unfair, unreasonable or downright unjust.

14. You do not trust people until they give you reason to.

You aren’t someone who builds trust easily, but when you do build strong ties, they tend to be life-long. You’re the epitome of a “ride or die” kind of person. You take your relationships very, very seriously.

15. The biggest problem in your childhood was that you weren’t treated with more dignity, like an adult.

The thing that probably bothered you the most about being a kid was that you were treated… like a kid. You weren’t regarded with the same level of dignity and respect that other people were, so you felt no need to reciprocate that sense of respectfulness. This could get you in trouble at times.

16. You have a strong sense of justice and fairness.

And you’re hyper-sensitive to the ways that major powers – as well as the people in your life – serve their egos, rather than the common good. (You’re also not afraid to speak out on it, no matter how controversial.)