17 Things You Should Know Before You Date A Runner
By Ella Ceron
1. Any and all foot fetishes should just be checked at the door. You really don’t want to know what happens to feet that log double-digit miles in a week.
2. But if you would like to gift your runner lover with a pedicure, they would be happy to accept. (Yes, men need ’em, too.)
3. At some point, they will probably show up at your front door, no car or bike or public transportation in sight. Even though they live 10 miles away. They will then shrug, say it was no big deal, and collapse on your couch for the next 5 hours.
4. Get used to sweaty, salty hugs. There will be a lot of them.
5. If you ever consider moving in together, they will lobby for a place that’s close to a park or a trail.
6. If you ever consider getting a pet together, they will lobby for a big dog who does well on a leash.
7. If you ever consider going on vacation together, chances are they will look into running a race while they’re out there.
8. (At the very least, you’d better leave room in the suitcase for shoes and lots of spandex.)
9. Sleeping in on the weekends is an obsolete notion. They will always want to get up and run.
10. If you ever decide to go on a diet, they will not understand why you want to go low-carb. A bagel is a bread product that is shaped like an angel’s halo for a reason.
11. If you’re ever looking to propose to them, popping the question on a big piece of poster board in the middle of their marathon will actually be welcomed as really, really ridiculously romantic.
12. You know that weird, music video fantasy of surprising someone with a new pair of Louboutins? Running shoes are $600 cheaper on average. Surprise a runner with a new pair of shoes and they will be just as happy.
13. They and their friends will immediately launch into jargon you have never heard before. They will patiently explain it to you, but you’re still going to be mystified.
14. Their idea of “pretty jewelry” is a medal. Or an inspirational pendant to commemorate a race or their time.
15. Seeing them dressed up and out of running clothes is a sure sign that today is a special day.
16. They will constantly ask you if you’d like to maybe join them some day (and will do a victory dance if and when you do.)
17. But some days, they really just need to go it alone to clear their own heads. This might happen after you’ve had a fight, or if they received some bad news or had an awful day at work. Don’t pressure them to talk to you before they run. Respect this moment of quiet solitude. They’ll come back sweaty and gross, but high on endorphins and ready to work things through with you.