19 Times Aziz Ansari’s Twitter Was More Entertaining Than Anyone Else’s Ever
By Kim Quindlen
1. His ‘Jurassic World’ experiment.
What happens when Andy Dwyer leaves the Parks Dept to help train dinosaurs? I’m about to get insanely high and find out! #JURASSICWORLD
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) June 13, 2015
2. The fantastic idea he had for hotel services.
Hotels should offer Turn UP service where they leave you champagne and blast “U Mad”
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) June 11, 2015
3. When he posted this and the Parks fangirl within you had a heart attack.
Our last day filming on Parks and Rec. I’m gonna miss this glorious cast and crew very much. #ThankYouParksCrew pic.twitter.com/aQoNxj6HGE
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) December 13, 2014
4. When he used cheesecake to prove a point.
So #NationalCheesecakeDay is trending, when is #TimetoDoSomethingAboutBlackPeopleGettingMurderedForNoReasonDay? #SamDubose
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) July 30, 2015
5. And then beat all the trolls to the punch.
Anyone typing up racist @ replies, don’t risk getting all that cheesecake on your keyboard, I don’t read em anyway.
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) July 30, 2015
6. The fact that he does things like this and posts it on Twitter so someone can find it.
During airport delays, I now randomly sign copies of my book: pic.twitter.com/741eZfTgOL
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) July 13, 2015
7. And then someone actually finds it.
Someone found my signed “JFK edition” of Modern Romance! Hahaha pic.twitter.com/V8Ew5ces3j
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) July 14, 2015
8. When he shares the more interesting conversations that he overhears.
“You can’t tell me we going to get tacos, then say we going to do acid instead” whoever I heard say this on the street yesterday Plz explain
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) June 30, 2015
9. When he shares really cool facts from ‘Modern Romance.’
In 1967, 76% of women would marry someone they were NOT romantically in love with. https://t.co/0ZrrUTIx1a
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) June 17, 2015
10. His understanding of what it’s like to be single.
If you are single, you have problems like, “Why did this dude just text me ‘Hey’ and an emoji of a top hat?
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) May 28, 2015
11. When he reminded you that the Parks people are all friends in real life.
Awww, I miss Offerman, he’s the best RT @EvaBifulk @azizansari hows Ron swanson
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) March 6, 2015
12. When he summed up life so accurately.
Worst things in life: 1) Friends and family passing away 2) Fruit flies
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) February 28, 2015
13. The way that he wishes people a Happy Halloween.
If you’re bald and you’re not dressing as Pitbull tonight, what’s wrong with you? #MrWorldWide #Timber
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) November 1, 2014
14. The fact that he loves his parents so much.
Hugging my parents on stage at MSG. Happiest I’ve ever been. pic.twitter.com/tTXRtckrqH
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) October 10, 2014
15. When he posted this and it was everything.
Shooting some crazy stuff for Parks with @unfoRETTAble: pic.twitter.com/CY0zd04BxS
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) October 1, 2014
16. #MOUSERAT
Really feel like Mouserat should be the musical guest tonight on SNL.
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) September 27, 2014
17. When he knew how real HANGER can be.
“Hey I know you didn’t mention being hungry, but here’s a tasty snack if you want it.” – Greatest Thing Ever Said to Me
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) September 23, 2014
18. This sweet and hilarious bit about his dad.
Dad trying to praise his Nespresso but keeps referring to it as a “Netflix Espresso Machine.”
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) August 31, 2014
19. …That just keeps getting better.
“You put in the Netflix pods and the espresso comes right out. It’s very easy.”
— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) August 31, 2014
Thanks, universe, for giving us Aziz Ansari.