20 Alternate Titles For Savages


It’s a shorter workweek thanks to America turning one year older, and while we’re all trying to curb our hangovers and overstuffed stomachs, Hollywood is cashing in on the fact that dark, AC-cranked theaters is where we’ll all head to this weekend to cure our July 4th woes. Case in point, the adaptation of Savages, a story about two weed dealers and their sexy shared girlfriend vs. a Mexican drug cartel. Throw in John Travolta as a corrupt DEA agent and Salma Hayek’s cute accent and you have the fixings for a quintessential summer movie. So, in the spirit of Savages coming out this weekend, I thought I’d round up some alternate titles for the film solely based off its trailer, IMDB page, and other cultural ephemera I deem relevant.

  1. Fred Savages
  2. The Return: Benicio del Toro’s Moustache
  3. Two Guys, A Girl, and a Mexican Drug Cartel
  4. Ménage à Bong
  5. Lively Swap
  6. Oliver Stoned
  7. Dubious Weed Dealers: From Cheech and Chong to Ben and Chon
  8. 2012: A Drug Odyssey
  9.  Ophelia to O: A History of Damsels in Distress
  10. Babel Pt. II (See the Movie Posters)
  11. John Travolta’s Hair Line
  12. John Travolta’s Waist Line
  13. John Travolta’s Soul Patch
  14. Behind the Mask: Luchadores and Drug Syndicates
  15. XOXO Ganja Girl
  16. Another Movie About Weed Set in California
  17. The Movie Emile Hirsch Does in 2012
  18. Dude, Where’s My Pot?
  19. Weed 101: Studying Botany at Berkeley
  20. What Tim Riggins Is Doing Now

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image – Savages