20 Things Girls Say To Guys At The Bar Vs. What They Really Mean

Every lady has been there — caught in terrible conversation with an interested suitor while you wait for your vodka tonic. Despite your cavalier attitude and closed-off body language, he obviously does not get the hint you’re not into it. Here are 20 responses ladies give guys at the bar we have no interest in, and what we’re actually saying.

1. “It was nice meeting you, I’m going to go find my friends now before I lose them.”

“I’m too nice to tell you I think you’re weird and you’re wearing too much cologne. I’m going to go far, far away from you now.”

2. “I just finished my drink which means I should probably head home now.”

“Buy me another drink so I can talk to you for five more seconds before finding someone else.”

3. “Do you know what time it is?”

“I’m about to act like it’s way later than I thought and get the fuck out of here.”

4. “I’m going to run to the restroom and be right back.”

“I’m literally never coming back to this seat ever again for the rest of my life.”

5. “Sorry, I’m not from around here.”

“I live 5 minutes away, I just don’t want to give you hope that we’ll ever hang out after this terrible encounter ends.”

6. “Who’s your friend?”

“Please introduce me to the much more attractive man standing next to you and then kindly leave so we can suck face later.”

7. “It’s kind of hot in here.”

“I’m setting up a scenario where I can step outside for some ‘air’ in about 2 seconds and then never come back.”

8. “I’m just going to step outside really quickly and take this phone call.”

“There’s no one calling me right now, I just need an excuse to get away from you.”

9. “Nice blazer.”

“A lizard could pick out a better jacket than the piece of shit you have on.”

10. “Sorry, it’s kind of loud in here.”

“I’m making absolutely no attempt to listen to what you’re trying to say to me right now.”

11. “Oh. Cool.”

“Not cool. Nothing about what you just said was cool.”

12. “What am I doing this weekend? Probably going to brunch with my boyfriend.”

“I don’t have a boyfriend but it seems easier to say I do rather than tell you it’s not happening in a million years.”

13. “I’m just here with my girlfriends. We’re laying low tonight.”

“We’re not laying low. Once I’m able to get out of this conversation, I’m going to continue to chug Redbull and vodka until I throw up on all over myself and fight someone in the bathroom. But I’d prefer to do all of that without your company because you’re weird.”

14. “Oh my god, you’re adorable.”

“I’m going to talk to you on the same level as my nieces so you slowly realize I want nothing to do with your penis.”

15. “Well, I should probably get going. Thanks for the drink.”

“Your breath smells and I’d appreciate if you never came this close to my face again. Thanks for the drink.”

16. “I’d love to hang out next week, except I have this thing with my roommate and I’m not sure about the specifics.”

“I don’t have a roommate and I’m going to make up a very vague fake event so I will definitely be busy at the time you ask to get together.”

17. “My plans this weekend? I’ll keep you posted.”

“I’m not going to respond to your phone calls or text messages. I’m also about to give you a fake number just to be safe.”

18. “I should go check on my friends.”

“They’re fine. But I’m leaving anyway.”

19. “I actually don’t have my phone on me at the moment.”

“My phone’s in my pocket but I’d like to sever all communication with you as soon as possible.”

20. “ Maybe I’ll see you around.”

“If I ever see you in public again, I’m going to hide behind a bush and pray we don’t make eye contact. If we do, I’m going to start speaking a foreign language and pretend my name is Svetlana.”