21 Epiphanies You’ll Have After Escaping Your College Bubble

1. Nobody is spending their time twiddling their thumbs, laughing maniacally at the fact that you don’t really know what you want to do with yourself.

2. There is a huge, huge difference between what academia values and what the real world demands.

3. If you maintain the rate at which you’ve been applying that social lubricant, you’ll probably be dead by 33.

4. Eating healthy isn’t so much a physical investment as it is a financial one.

5. While it helps to be a guy named Slade who has slicked back hair and connections for days, there is nothing more valuable than letting your game do the talking.

6. Very few decisions are temporary, in the sense that all of them have rabbit holes you can easily fall down. Make one too many compromises, and you can easily be 37 and miserable.

7. Reading is pretty great when it’s not forced upon you.

8. Happy hour isn’t so much a luxury as it can be necessity.

9. Your living situation in college was actually as abhorrent as your parents made it out to be.

10. When it comes to making money/advancing in an industry, there are no rules. Only results.

11. It’s not so much about knowing stuff as it is making it appear that you know stuff.

12. There’s no point of looking too far into the future, because you have no idea how different you’re life’s going to be three months from now.

13. There are few things more difficult than composing a two sentence email.

14. As an entry-level in the professional world, the worst thing you can do is have an unjustified ego.

15. “Paying your dues” is actually extremely necessary. It’s the process during which you cease being a total idiot, and graduate into being only half of one.

16. Idealism only really works under ideal circumstances.

17. Brunch, while a nice way of demonstrating to peers that you’re “on the right track,” is a financially foolhardy move. Which is why it’s so socially necessary.

18. It’s arguably less important to impress the boss as it is to impress people at a similar level as you. In the long run, these are the connections that will get you places.

19. Taking things too seriously is boring. Never taking anything seriously is annoying. Best to just be perfect at all times.

20. It’s very, very easy to attribute lack of successes on external factors like the economy. It’s a lot harder to swallow your pride and accept responsibility for your situation–particularly given that pride is a concept, and concepts are usually not edible.

21. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a moment to breathe. There are few things more attractive than a nice, loud exhale.