4 Ways New Year’s Resolutions Are Just Like Relationships

Welcome back from your fabulous or dysfunctional Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Winter Holiday celebration. Now it’s time to rack our brains and figure out what resolution we’re going to break—I mean, make—this year. But before you just come up with a promise to yourself, really evaluate if you’re ready for a long-term commitment.

1. New Year’s resolutions aren’t always love at first sight

Sometimes what we think we want isn’t what we need. You might want to be with the next world-renowned supermodel, but you need someone who gets you, keeps you grounded, and will always be there for you. And if that person happens to be a supermodel, good for you! But it’s not likely. So for your New Year’s resolution, evaluate what you want and what you need in life. Maybe your resolution shouldn’t be to save up for a sports car, so much as to endeavor to save your body from a heart attack. You won’t be able to enjoy the sports car from a hospital bed – or worse, your casket.

2. Date your New Year’s resolution before committing to it

It’s rude to say you’ll date someone for a year and then flake out. Actually, it’s weird to say you’ll date someone for a year in the first place. So, instead, go on a few dates with your resolution before you’re in a full-blown relationship with it. Diet for a little bit and see if it’s something you can commit to day by day for 365 days. Or, if you want to manage debt, do your research on methods that might work best for you short- and long-term. Whatever resolution you make this year, first figure out if it’s really something you’re ready to commit to.

3. You’re the one paying in your New Year’s resolution relationship

Both relationships and resolutions require sacrifice. They can eat up your time and finances, depending. Eating healthier means finding more time and energy to cook at home. Running a marathon can mean hiring a personal trainer or buying a gym membership . . . and actually going to the gym . . . and actually working out. Good relationships sometimes require work. But it’s good work, the best kind of work. While the resolution you commit to will require sacrifice, you’ll reap what you sow.

4. Maybe you’re not ready for a resolution . . . yet

New Year’s Day may pressure you to make a change to which you actually aren’t ready to commit. Sure, like any fun dating relationship, your resolution could last a couple months, but then it’s likely to burst into flames at the end of an ugly run. And no one likes bursts of flames except for pyromaniacs and cold people. If you’re not ready to keep to your own word, don’t make that promise to yourself. Maybe start with smaller, more realistic expectations. For instance, instead of losing 200 pounds this year, start by simply cutting desserts out of your diet. Whatever you might want your resolution to be, if you don’t think you can keep it, work on the issues preventing you from being open to change. There might be deeper issues there, more than you know.

For those of you who will be making New Year’s resolutions, I hope the very best for your upcoming year. Choosing the right resolution relationship and sticking it out can create some really excellent results!