6 Things I Learned From Postponing My Wedding In A Damn Pandemic

1. You cannot trust anything in this world to go as planned. Even a wedding, which requires planning a year in advance, is never going to go right. It could rain. Family members could cause drama. Or there could be a full-blown pandemic. As hard as it is to learn you don’t have nearly as much control over your life as you wish, it’s also a wake-up call. You need to be able to roll with the punches. You need to stay flexible. You need to remember that planning ahead is smart, but it doesn’t mean anything is guaranteed. There could always be chaos.

2. Surrounding yourself with the right people will make awful experiences slightly easier. There are certain people who are going to support your decisions with a smile on their face. People who are going to trust your gut. People who are going to be happy with whatever you choose to do, as long as you believe it’s the best thing for you. These are the people who you should surround yourself with because they are going to make your worst moments feel much smoother, much more tolerable, much more survivable. Meanwhile, the wrong people will make you feel a million times worse. They’ll make you doubt your own opinions and weigh you down with extra, unnecessary stress. They aren’t worth your trouble.

3. You’re allowed to feel the way you feel, even if others have it worse. You’re allowed to be upset about bad things happening to you. You aren’t selfish for being upset about something so small. Really, it’s not small. It’s your wedding day. In any other situation, this would be huge. Remember, it’s entirely possible to be sad about what’s happening to the world right now, to understand that your problems aren’t that bad in comparison to others, while also mourning the loss of the wedding you had planned.

4. Some people mean well — and you have to give them a break. Some people aren’t going to be great at calming you down when you’re upset. They’re going to say the exact opposite of what you want to hear. But you have to take a second to figure out whether what they said is truly toxic and unhelpful, or whether they’re only misguided and unsure how to make the situation better. Some people’s hearts are in the right place. They just don’t know how to cheer you up, because honestly, it’s impossible.

5. You should enjoy the moment more. There’s absolutely no telling what tomorrow will bring. Even if you put one-hundred percent of your effort into planning the perfect day, it could all fall apart in a heartbeat. That’s why you should focus on enjoying the present, enjoying what is in front of you right now. You never know what’s around the corner, but you know what you have today, and you should appreciate it while you can.

6. You can adapt to anything. You might feel like this is the end of the world. You might dread the idea of changing your plans. But in the end, you’re going to be okay. You’re going to handle this with more grace than you ever thought possible. You’re going to get through this, and in the end, you’re going to be married.