7 Clever Responses Mature Women Use When Confronted By Unwanted Male Attention


Reality check: every woman looking for love endures her share of unwanted male attention. Whether you’re online dating, going to singles events, or hanging out at upscale restaurant bars to meet men, you will encounter the occasional player or jerk.

Even though it would be wonderful to only engage with high quality men, this annoyance is part of dating and, sorry, it’s completely unavoidable. Some men are just rude, nosey, or jerks.

Naturally you want to make them go away quickly. The trouble is, when you’re out in public, other men, who actually are desirable, watch how you interact with those first men who approach you.

As a dating coach for women, I hear about a variety of ways my clients respond to off-putting men. Many women get upset about the “wrong men” talking to them. Some get angry that these men have the nerve to approach them.

But, women with confidence don’t get thrown off or flustered by players and jerks. Attractive women with strong self-esteem rely on their self-worth to kick in, which helps them rise above the situation, hold their boundaries, and handle it all with style and grace.

Think about it — why let a player or jerk ruffle your feathers or ruin your day? When you put out negative energy in response to these men, you lower your vibration to their level.

Instead, maintain calm and a positive outlook so you can go about your day being as attractive as possible. Don’t give your power away to men who aren’t worth your time!

Need some help shutting down the advances of nosey, rude jerks? Try out these responses to reject a man or deflect his pick up lines and unwanted questions:

1. Would you like to dance?

How to respond:

  • “I’m taking a break right now. Perhaps another time.”
  • “I prefer dancing to songs with a faster beat.”
  • “Oh thanks, but these shoes aren’t really for dancing.”

2. Can I have your phone number?

How to respond:

  • “My digits are very personal. How about e-mail?”
  • “E-mail is the best way to reach me”
  • “That’s OK, I think I already have your number.”
  • “Why don’t I give you a call?”

3. Can I take you home tonight?

How to respond:

  • “Aren’t you sweet, I’ll tell you later.”
  • “What a nice thought, let me think about that.

4. Why are you still single?

How to respond:

  • “That’s my little secret. Why are you single?”
  • “Aren’t you a curious guy?”
  • “Isn’t that a puzzle? I’m still working on that.”
  • “How nice of you to ask. Are you this curious about all women you talk to?”

5. Why did you get divorced?

How to respond:

  • “I can tell you that later, let’s talk about something upbeat.”
  • “I’d rather focus on you — you’re much more interesting.”
  • “Didn’t you hear, divorce is the new four letter word, let’s talk about your favorite movie instead.”

6. Do you want to hang out sometime?

How to respond:

  • “What an interesting invitation.”
  • “How nice of you to ask, I’ll give it some thought.”
  • “Can I get back to you on that?”

7. How old are you?

How to respond:

  • “A gentleman never asks and a lady never answers.”
  • “Old enough to know better.”
  • “Just the right age for whatever I want to do.”
  • “I’ve finally arrived at the perfect age.”

Choose your favorite responses and rehearse them before the next time you go out to meet men. Then, when you run into a jerk asking unwanted questions, you already know exactly what to say before you move on to meet better men.

This post originally appeared at YourTango.