10 Pros And Cons About This Terrible (And Endless) New England Winter Weather
By Ashley Twigg
Pro: Driving anywhere is now an adrenaline rush. Playing chicken daily because half the roads now only fit one car at a time. Closing your eyes and gunning it turning out of any street because you can’t see past the ten foot snowbanks and fear the imminent death of being crushed by oncoming vehicles. Cheap thrills really.
Con: Driving anywhere is actually a nightmare…all the time. This is of course assuming you have been able to shovel out your car, and that it starts and that it drives, and that the heat works. Purchasing sled dogs and your own personal Musher-Chauffer may be a more viable option at this point.
Pro: You get to spend a lot of time with your family and friends that you are bundled in at home with every other day, prepping for the next storm while simultaneously shoveling/thawing out from the last one.
Con: You have to spend far too much time with your family and friends that you are trapped in your icebox snow dungeon with, that no amount of rock salt or pipe-dreams of summer can help you escape from.
Pro: Crime rates have gone down, so that’s nice.
Con: Stupidity rates have gone up. The Mayor of Boston actually had a press conference advising people on the dangers of jumping out of second floor windows into rock hard, frozen piles of snow. (However hilarious that may be.)
Pro: You now have a plethora of knowledge about ice dams and roof maintenance and new routes to walk to your office in in 3 degree weather because THERE IS NO PARKING ANYWHERE.
Con: You now have to use deep breathing techniques to prevent yourself from making an icicle shiv and assaulting someone over parking spots every morning.
Pro: The longer winter lasts the more time you have to get yourself beach season ready!
Con: You don’t remember what the beach looks like…