Courses They Should Actually Be Teaching In College

Responsible Partying: You’re Not a Sorority Girl Anymore
Feigning Disinterest in Costume Parties
Overcoming Your Red Solo® Cup Dependency Once and For All
Surviving Your Twenties Without Doing Irreparable Damage to Your Body or Your Dignity (Whatever Comes First)
How to Dance at Weddings
Intro to Gerontology: When Memorization of Popular Song Lyrics, Boy Band Star Names and Other Such Inanities Stops Coming Naturally

How Not to Be The Low-Hanging Fruit OR How Not to Be The Destination at the End of the Path to Least Resistance (Depending on Your Metaphorical Wording Preferences)
Making New Friends, Non-Creeper Style
Identifying the Greenness of the Grass on Your Side
Game Theory: #Winning Despite Your Hatred of Having to Play In The First Place
How It’s Done: Gray Area Casual Dating
Intro to Urban Planning: Erecting Airtight Friend Zones and Circles of Trust

Reading Between the (Email) Lines
Advancement 101: Delegating Work to Underlings Despite Still Feeling Like One Yourself
Effective Pain Management Techniques: Networking & Mixers
Outwitting Passive-Aggressive Coworkers With — You Guessed It — Even More Passive-Aggression
The Art of Powering Through 1,497 Unread Emails After Getting Back From That Vacation You Took Precisely to Avoid the Cesspool That Is Your Inbox
$3 Sake Bombs and Other Happy Hour Fundamentals

Cultivating a Political Backbone Without Irritating Your Loved Ones on Facebook
50 Non-Reddit-Sourced Ways to Exude Coolness Given Your Dwindling Pop Culture Prowess
Coping Skills: When Reality TV Is The Closest To Reality You Get
Emerging Household Trends: Repopulating the Empty Nest
Intro to Civic Participation: Perennial Under-informed Voting (If You Even Make It to the Polls) and Jury Duty Avoidance Tactics

Zen Basics: Teaching Your Parents How to Use Technology Without Imploding
Proper, Adult-like News Consumption When All You Want to Do is Read BarStoolSports, ThoughtCatalog, or PerezHilton
The Art Of Wasting Precious Time On The Interwebz
Self-Rescue Techniques: When You Find Yourself in the “Weird” Parts Of YouTube
Post-Limewire Age Music Acquisition for Dummies
Explaining AOL, MySpace, GeoCities, Friendster, and Xanga to Today’s Youth

Acclimation 101: When Nothing Surprises You Anymore
Suppressing Shame and Schadenfreude So No One Notices It (Or So You Think)
Data Skills: Managing the Unnecessary Overabundance of Choice in Practically Every Aspect of Modern Life
Personal Finance Fluency By Way Of Cheesy Self-Help Blogs & Books
Advanced List-making: When You’ve Lost the Ability to Form Cohesive Paragraphs of Interconnected Thoughts