I’ll Hate Myself In The Morning, But I’ll Love You All Night

I see you staring at me from across the bar. For a split second I try to convince myself to walk away. I tell myself it isn’t worth it, that you’re not worth it. I tell myself I’ll hate myself in the morning. As much as I know that it’s true, I don’t stop walking your way. Your coy little smile always draws me in and I can’t resist you anymore.

I know you’re not good for me; everyone in the room can see that. I should just turn around, head in the other direction, not give you the time of day. But I’m not strong enough to break the tension between us, especially not after a few drinks.

You’ve become all I want. You’ve shattered all the strength I’ve managed to build up because I can’t turn you down.

I want to run my fingers through your hair and wake up by your side entangled in sheets and regret because regret always follows. Every time.

We know it won’t work between us, but we keep stupidly trying. We both know we’re not good for each other, but you’ve turned into the one person who I can’t resist. You’re the one I can’t help but want even though I know things will never work out in our favor.

Because the fire keeps burning between us and we can’t put it out no matter how hard we try;  you’re the gasoline and I always catch like wildfire.

I want you; I want all of you, even though I shouldn’t have you, even though I can’t have you. I tell myself just one more time. I tell myself I’ll walk away from you next time because there won’t be a next time. I tell myself I’ll finally start listening to the voice in my head trying to convince me to walk away. I’ll do it in the morning when I once again open my eyes and feel my body fill with regret, because I know I’ll hate myself in the morning, but I’m still going to love you all night.

I’m convinced one more time won’t hurt because I want to be wrapped in your arms. I want to feel your lips on mine. I want to feel your hands on my face. I want to feel close to you. I want to give into you again because as wrong as it is, it also feels so right, so I do.

I know you’re a bad decision before I make it, but you and I are like bees and pollen. We always find each other and once we do there’s no stopping us.

Leaving us behind is going to be hard, but I’m making a promise to myself that the last time was the last time and as tempted as I am, there won’t be a next time. We owe it to ourselves to move on because I’m tired of hating myself in the morning from loving you all night.