This Doctor Asked Terminally Ill Kids What Gave Their Life Meaning And Their Answers Were Beautifully Simple
It’s easy to discount children’s thoughts as being naive or uninformed, but the truth is this — kids have some of the wisest words you’ll ever hear. Need proof? This pediatric doctor interviewed some of his terminally ill patients to ask about meaning in their life and I learned more from their answers than I have from reading hundreds of books in my life.
The doctor, Alastair McAlpine, tweeted about the conversations he had with these children, and you’re honestly going to want to grab a tissue because the answers are, to put it quite simply, heartbreaking.
For an assignment, I asked some of my terminal paediatric palliative care patients what they had enjoyed in life, and what gave it meaning. Kids can be so wise, y'know. Here are some of the responses (Thread).
— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
First:
NONE said they wished they'd watched more TV
NONE said they should've spent more time on Face Book
NONE said they enjoyed fighting with others
NONE enjoyed hospital
/1— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
MANY mentioned their pets:
'I love Rufus, his funny bark makes me laugh.'
'I love when Ginny snuggles up to me at night and purrs'
'I was happiest riding Jake on the beach.'
/2— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
MANY mentioned their parents, often expressing worry or concern:
'Hope mum will be ok. She seems sad.'
'Dad mustn't worry. He'll see me again soon.'
'God will take care of my mum and dad when I'm gone'
/3— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
ALL of them loved ice-cream.
/4— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
ALL of them loved books or being told stories, especially by their parents:
'Harry Potter made me feel brave.'
'I love stories in space!'
'I want to be a great detective like Sherlock Holmes when I'm better!'Folks, read to your kids! They love it. /5
— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
MANY wished they had spent less time worrying about what others thought of them, and valued people who just treated them 'normally'.
'My real friends didn't care when my hair fell out.'
'Jane came to visit after the surgery and didn't even notice the scar!' /6— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Many of them loved swimming, and the beach.
'I made big sandcastles!'
'Being in the sea with the waves was so exciting! My eyes didn't even hurt!' /7— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Almost ALL of them valued kindness above most other virtues:
'My granny is so kind to me. She always makes me smile.'
'Jonny gave me half his sandwich when I didn't eat mine. That was nice.'
'I like it when that kind nurse is here. She's gentle. And it hurts less' /8— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Almost ALL of them loved people who made them laugh:
'That magician is so silly! His pants fell down and I couldn't stop laughing!'
'My daddy pulls funny faces which I just love!'
'The boy in the next bed farted! Hahaha!'Laughter relieves pain. /9
— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Kids love their toys, and their superheroes.
'My Princess Sophia doll is my favourite!'
'I love Batman!' (All the boys love Batman)
'I like cuddling my teddy' /10— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Finally, they ALL valued time with their family. Nothing was more important.
'Mum and dad are the best!'
'My sister always hugs me tight'
'No one loves me like mummy loves me!' /11— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Take home message:
Be kind. Read more books. Spend time with your family. Crack jokes. Go to the beach. Hug your dog. Tell that special person you love them.These are the things these kids wished they could've done more. The rest is details.
Oh… and eat ice-cream. /End
— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The whole thread was incredibly touching and enlightening, and I’m not going to lie — I was sobbing uncontrollably while reading the entire thing.
https://twitter.com/ChrissyCostanza/status/959235742588375040
https://twitter.com/sarahdessen/status/959050433946963968
Children are wiser than they are credited for. They often get an A+ in Spidey Sense.
— Nancy Baker (@NancyJoBaker) February 1, 2018
It’s amazing that these children seem to understand more about life than people four times their age. So many of us are stuck worrying about things that are beyond our control or obsessing over things that, in a few years, won’t matter to us at all that we forget the things that truly give our lives meaning. On the last days of your life, you’re not going to be thinking about that text you accidentally sent or the TV show someone spoiled for you or the document you forget to save to your computer — you’ll be thinking of the people you loved, the happiness you felt, and the moments in life that never left you.
Maybe the best we can do is live a life we think is meaningful. We owe it to the people who won’t have the chance to.