It’s Okay If Your Self-Love Journey Is Messier Than Expected
By Farah Ayaad
It’s okay if you have no fucking clue what self-care is. Self-care is a religion you discover on your own. Self-care is painful because it requires commitment and effort on the daily. Self-care is the most underrated form of self-love, and it’s the most diverse. Self-care can be taking care of your skin, nourishing your soul, or attending to your needs whatever they are. Self-care can be drawing boundaries, removing toxic people from your life and standing up for yourself. Self-care can be saying no to things that you don’t want, saying yes to the things you do, and not saying anything at all.
Self-care is anything that makes you feel at peace with yourself and the rest of the world.
It’s okay if you struggle with caring for yourself. It’s okay if you don’t know what self-care is to you and it’s okay if you don’t seem to translate what you know you need into action. It’s okay if you can’t get rid of destructive self-talk like “I don’t need to go on vacation” and “putting myself first is selfish.” It’s okay if you’re not ready to ask for help from others or professional guidance. It’s okay if you don’t have it in you to enforce your self-care mantra with family and friends. It’s okay if you are uncomfortable in showcasing to others how to treat you.
It’s okay if you’re not seeing results. It’s okay if it takes longer than you thought. It’s okay if some self-care practices haven’t worked for you. It’s okay if you didn’t receive the support you were expecting. Your self-care journey is different than everyone else’s because self-care is about what works for your person, your heart, your mind and soul. Be patient with yourself and have faith that you will find the right self-care for yourself.
It’s okay if you find it difficult to change your self-image. It’s okay if you don’t see your beauty on the inside and the outside just yet. It will take you a while until you appreciate your imperfections. It will take a you while until you recognize your uniqueness. It will take you a while until you celebrate your confidence with the rest of the world. Be kind to yourself because it’s not your fault. We are not socialized to love and accept who we truly are. At a very young age, we are taught to validate other people’s opinions, not our own. In fact, we are pushed to fix ourselves instead of just embracing our identities. Don’t let people who don’t have their priorities in order deter you from your own path of self-acceptance and self-healing.
It’s okay if takes you months or years to master self-care. All that matters is that you are being kind and patient with yourself. It’s okay if you change your mind about what works for you and what doesn’t. It’s okay if you fail more than you succeed in looking out for yourself. All that matters is that you are not giving up on yourself, that you are fighting for what is best for your wellbeing.