An Open Letter To The Openly Homophobic People I Encounter On A Daily Basis


To the group of women who laughed when their friend accidentally pushed into them and replied, “It’s okay ladies, I’m not a Lesbian.”

To that bus driver who nearly forgot to go when the light turned green because he was too busy staring at us holding hands.

To the old man at the restaurant whom on finding out that I am only interested in relationships with women, declined further assistance from me and gave me a stern, disgusted look.

To every single person who tells us that, “we haven’t found the right person,” “we haven’t experienced a true man,” “we’re too pretty,” “It’s such a waste,” and, “I’m sure it’s just a phase.”

To the group of people on a night out that think it is perfectly acceptable to grope us, ask us personal and intimate questions and tell us their own opinion about sexuality.

To the woman who said I should probably change my outfit because, “I look too gay.”

To the man I refused to date that then turned nasty and said, “I must have been abused to be so twisted now.”

To those who think having a gay friend is like having an accessory.

To the man who let me sleep on his couch when I was travelling and then ignored me when I said I had a partner and remonstrated that he couldn’t stand gay people. That, “those kind of people,” wouldn’t be allowed in his house, so in fear of a sleepless night I changed the ‘she’ pronoun into ‘he.’

To the man that said, “It was okay for women to touch other women but not for men to touch men.”

To all the straight girls I have met who have told me repeatedly and often that they, “prefer men,” as if I was going to try it on with all of them.

To the catcalls, sexual remarks, mutterings and intrusive stares.

To the pitiful, sad comments that constitute an understanding that they hoped, we won’t have hard lives despite the decision we have chosen to make.”

To the idea that is or isn’t a decision.

This is an open letter to demonstrate the daily conversations, accusations, and looks and overall homophobic reactions gay women and men undertake on a daily basis across the world. We are no different. We are not any more fascinating or individual than two people in love. We lead the same lives and we would like to do this without constantly fearing the world around us. Homophobia is everywhere and even those passing statements or withering looks can cause heartbreak to those of us who everyday are just trying to live our own lives and be comfortable in our skin. This is an open letter and I hope it makes you think.