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The Scooby Files: A Letter From Fred To Daphne About Her Increasingly Aggressive Web Presence

You and Evan at the beach! You and Evan at the movies! You and Evan taking ballroom dancing classes! (Which I also asked you to do when we were together, but whatever.)

All The Reasons I Am Not Attending Your New Year’s Party

Why don’t we sing something we all know at 12 a.m. Like, say, “Can’t Touch This”? Or the theme song to the Golden Girls?

10 Signs You’re A 20-Something, And You’re Santa Claus

YOLO applies strictly to your candy cane intake.

Valuable Lessons In Parenting I’ve Learned On The Subway

Children need to build up a healthy immune system, and there is no faster way than to put your mouth on anything in the subway.

Ultimate Christmas Movie Showdown: ‘A Christmas Story’ Vs. ‘Die Hard’

My relationship with both is intimate, and deeply personal. You may want to get the tissues handy…

And The Most Ridiculous Huffington Post Story Of 2012 Is…

That’s right, the pet of a woman who’s famous for having sex on camera died. In case you were wondering why the flags at your local Forever 21 were flying at half mast.

How To Satisfy Your ‘Sherlock’ Addiction Until It Comes Back On Air In 2014

If you’re as panicked as I am about the delay, here are a few tips I’ve come up with to satisfy your Sherlock fix. They’re not as fun as a brilliantly solved caper, but for now I guess they’ll have to do.

Christmas Gifts I’ve Bought My Cat

To truly reach the pinnacle of insane pet celebration, you have to physically cook your cat or dog dinner.

6 Food Network Stars I Would Like To Have Sex With

I know it’s an obvious choice to have the hots for Giada, but I’m only human. Plus, who doesn’t want to have homemade Bruschetta after intercourse? Or during, for that matter?

8 Life Lessons I’ve Learned From Watching House Hunters

Many of the homes for sale are still being lived in, so prospective buyers get to see, and comment on, the owners’ design choices as they look around. And let me tell ya, they are not kind.

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