The Worst Place To Say “I Love You”
There are a few less romantic movies to watch with your girlfriend. Schindler’s List and Shoah come to mind off the top of my head.
Billie Joe Armstrong And The Death Of Punk
All of us want, covet and desire. We want to be recognized. We covet material goods. We desire affection. “Like, favorite, share, upvote, etc.”
25 Alternate Titles for Here Comes Honey Boo Boo
To say that the Thompson family is currently defining the American zeitgeist would be a gross understatement. In six month’s time, we’ll all be wearing muumuus and ‘extreme couponing’ until we just can’t take it anymore.
The Perils Of Being Young
Frank and Lili are roommates in an icy, bleak section of Halifax, Nova Scotia. Each chapter is told from one of their perspectives, as they struggle with the common anxieties of being young and bored.
Notes For My Future Girlfriend
Feel free to stop by. Just let me know you’re my next girlfriend and I’ll tell the doorman to send you up. We have a lot of catching up to do.
I’m Doing Stand-Up At My High School Reunion
The only thing that truly matters is how I want to be judged. So, I guess I want to be judged as myself. Funny or not funny, coward or hero, I need to do this.
5 Best Places To Say “I Love You”
A person will never be more vulnerable or willing to accept affection than when their face is covered in a frothy mixture of buffalo sauce and ranch dressing.
25 Things The New Yorker iPhone App Doesn’t Do
Help me figure out how to tie a Windsor knot.
On Potty Training Your Cat
We can suss out how to handle our own waste, but hardly anyone has mastered a stress-free method for disposing of the junk that comes from our four-legged buddies.
An Open Letter From Pizza
I see the way you look at bacon. If you want to start eating other food, that’s totally fine. I would respect your decision. I just want you to be honest with me.