Don’t Let Me Babysit Your Kids
If I’m spending time with your children I’ll want to talk to them about the stars and Carl Sagan. We’d build…
Dear Peaches Geldof, We’re Going To Miss You
We’ll remember you dearly.
Dear Class of 2016, Here Is Exactly Why You’re Fucked
“In all honesty, those catty high school girls that used to exclude you, make fun of you, or just ignore you all together, they were the ones actually preparing you for the real world; because they are the real world.”
This Is Why Writers Today Suck
A good writer looks at themselves dead in the eye on a daily basis and says, “Fuck you,” to the person throwing up last night’s wine in the sink.
I’m Not Good At Instagram
Look how not excited I am to take my own picture.
Maybe It Was Fate, Or Maybe It Was Just What I Needed
As I finished my journey home to my apartment, the roads were fresh with rain and glowing from the streetlights. It was dark and quiet, but I felt okay for the first time in weeks.
To The Person Wearing The Burberry Scarf
I’m one of those strange people that accounts for everything commuters are wearing when sitting on the subway.