Dancing With The Devil? Ryan Lochte To Join Dancing With The Stars


Is Ryan Lochte actually set to join the cast of “Dancing with the Stars”?

It appears so.

Producers of the hit TV series might as well start issuing Personal Protective Equipment to contestants, judges, and audience members to protect them from the backlash is sure to come from this controversial selection.

The equipment will also protect people from any unpredictable violent outbursts, temper tantrums, or meltdowns that the recently shamed American Olympian may have or provoke while filming on set of DWTS.

Okay sorry, that may be a little bit of an exaggeration on my part. My imagination got the best of me and my mind started to run a bit wild. But, I was able to recognize what was happening, identified where I was going wrong, and essentially stopped what I was doing.

Thank goodness there weren’t millions of eyes on me. Thank goodness law enforcement didn’t have to get dragged into this fiasco. The only person who saw my mistake was me.

Who knows what could have happened if I was caught doing what I was doing on a bigger platform. I could have lost big sponsorship deals. I could have embarrassed the entire nation whom I was representing at the world’s biggest competition. I could have even been selected to join the cast of Dancing with the Stars!

Producers at ABC, it reeks of desperation when you decide to have a disgraced Olympian sign onto your cast of “stars” not even a month after the alleged “incident” that disgraced your Olympian took place. How desperate are you for ratings?

Since morality is no longer an issue at your network, I heard that O.J. Simpson will be eligible for bail soon. I’m sure a man of his stature will skyrocket your ratings. You should really sit down and have a chat with him about possible partnerships.

Too bad El Chapo was recaptured. He would have done wonders for ABC. Not only would DWTS capture the attention of Americans, it could have captured the attention of people all around the world.

I guess you shouldn’t dwell too much on the past. Sadly, opportunities sometimes slip away. Just regroup, rethink, and restrategize on how you can maximize the benefits of having America’s most shamed athlete on your show.

‘Cause we all know that ratings are the only thing that matters when you’re the American Broadcasting Channel!

Screw morality!