Do Bartenders Really Have A Lot Of One-Night Stands?


The simple answer to this question is no. The more complicated answer is it depends. There is a popular myth within the drinking community which states that bartenders are well-known to sleep around, especially with complete strangers they’ve met at the bar.

This myth comes from the notion that since bartenders are social butterflies who are always on the prowl, it would only make sense that after (or even during) a work shift behind the bar, they are bound to fall into some type of sexual activity. All the necessary ingredients are there: attractive men and women, music, alcoholic beverages, etc.

So what’s the deal? I’ll say this: I’ve known a fair share of bartenders who have slept with a customer while they’re on the clock (extended bathroom break, anyone?). Sure it makes a pretty epic story to tell your friends later, but I never think it’s worth it. As far as an after-work late-night romp with the opposite sex? The sad truth is bartenders hardly ever get off of work in time for the deed to be done. Think about it. Last Call usually takes place at around 2:30 or 3:00 AM at a busy bar. Bartenders have to wipe down their entire bar, tip out their barbacks, count their cash drawer while their manager runs an audit, complete a bar sales report, and then spend an hour or so waiting for their credit-card tips to be converted into cash. When it’s all said and done the average bartender is walking out the front door anywhere from 4:30 to 5 AM. By that time, even if a bartender had a eager guy or girl waiting for them to finish their shift, the night’s drunkenness will have already worn off, the bar lights will be on at this point and the magic in the air will have completely dissipated. The mystique of sleeping with the hot bartender is no longer there.

I once worked at a bar that had a very popular male revue show every Saturday night. I would make a decent amount of cash tips on those nights (roughly $250-$300 at night’s end) and there would always be plenty of horny middle-aged women at my bar giving me their full attention. There was one regular of mine, let’s call her Margo, a divorcee with an amazing pair of Double-D breasts. She never tipped me less than $50, even if her drink tab didn’t call for it. On one Saturday, she was feeling particularly frisky, as was I, and we were making out at the bar, taking multiple Fireball shots and giving each other a seductive stare-down every twenty seconds. As I continued to ring in all of her drinks I knew for a fact that I was going to be knee-deep in some Margo that night. You know what ended up happening? The very beautiful Margo waited for me at the end of the night, sitting at the end of my bar. We chatted for a bit as I clocked out and told her to give me fifteen minutes as I rushed to my manager’s office to try and run my report. Fifteen minutes turned into twenty minutes; twenty minutes turned into an hour. When I finally made my way back to the bar, Margo was nowhere to be found. The opportunity for a night of passionate sex that was once so attainable vanished simply because as a bartender, I usually never get off work early enough to fool around.

Bartenders do have one-night stands, though. Yet it usually ends up happening between fellow bartenders.

The reason why bartenders sleep with other bartenders really comes down to one simple concept: proximity. If you work in close quarters with a person of the opposite sex long enough and you eventually add a little alcohol into the mix, sex is bound to take place. What’s worst of all is that every bar where I’ve ever worked, I’ve known at least two bartenders who were cheating on their spouses with someone on the bar staff. It’s also less risky to go home with your coworker than it is to go home with a random stranger who’s been eyeing you at the bar over the course of an evening. I cannot say I condone bartenders cheating on their boyfriends or girlfriends, but I understand it.

A bartender will only have a one-night stand with a customer if any of the following (or a combination of them) takes place:

• The bartender is horny
• The bartender is a bit tipsy
• The bartender just so happens to be in a really good mood

These are the top reasons I know of that a bartender would risk losing their job for a quickie with a customer. That’s why I believe it’s better for those who want to date a bartender to get to know them before choosing to hop in the sack with them. The truth of the matter is that if a bartender does have a one-night stand, it usually will be with a coworker instead of a customer because there will be less stress, a high level of proximity, and the ability to keep the pillow talk under wraps due to the fact that they see each other on a daily basis.

So there. I’ve laid it out there for you. Bartenders do have one-night stands, but seven times out of ten it’s with another bartender and not a customer.