Forgetting Is Easy, Letting Go Is Harder
By Marj Ostani
When people tend to move past their relationships they usually do it the other way around. Letting go comes first, then forgetting comes next. But here’s the sad truth:
Forgetting is easy. Letting go is harder.
Forgetting is easy — And though we always say we remember every single thing about them. And though we always say we see them in any places we go. And though we always say we hear them in every stranger we speak to. And though we always say we feel them in every hand we’ve slipped in… arms we’ve clung to… lips we’ve kissed; forgetting is easy. Because you don’t really forget, well not at all.
You just keep on remembering and remembering and remembering all those pieces that still visit your mind. You just keep on remembering and remembering all those memories that still float within your heart.
You just keep on remembering everything until you lose every single bit of them in all the new places you’ll go to, all the new people you’ll speak with, and everything in between.
Which is why forgetting is easy — Because you never really did force it to happen. They will stay with you until you slowly lose them in the process of letting go.
Letting go is harder. We’ve come up to this belief that ending things also means overcoming this stage. We’ve convinced ourselves that that’s it. We’ve already jumped off a massive step and that the following pain that will haunt us afterwards would solely rely on remembering and forgetting them all at once. But here’s the sad truth:
Forgetting is easy. Letting go is harder.
Because ending a relationship or setting someone free does not totally mean you’ve finally let them go. That’s just you trying to convince yourself that you’re actually moving on when in fact you’re not. Because how does one really let go of someone that easily? Here lies the very problem, you never really let go, well not at all.
Which is why letting go is harder. Because the truth is there will always be a part of you that still thinks you will end up together. You still hold on to your idea of how things will turn out if only things did work out. You still keep on romanticizing that things will change. For the better. For the best.
You protect that tiny little string which somehow still connects you to her, to him. Because you never really let go. It’s not that easy.
And while people often mistake moving on to the idea of letting go first, then forgetting comes next. It’s actually the other way around.
Because it’s only when you finally forget, that you’ve truly let them go.