Happiness Is Only Obtainable If You Stop Striving For It And Just Start Living
By Becca Martin
You should aim for happiness, but you shouldn’t center your whole universe around it. Happiness is like the unattainable goal everyone constantly reaches for, but usually comes up short because in those expectations we morph the ideas we associate with happiness. The more you want happiness, the more you will be unable to reach it and feel like you’ve failed.
In order to be happy you don’t need things to be perfect. Often times we associate happiness with perfection, even though those two things almost never go hand in hand. Just because something turns out ‘perfect’ doesn’t mean it will actually make you happy.
Sometimes happiness in born in sporadic, messy and unpredictable moments, those imperfect moments become the memories you cherish.
We make happiness out to be this unattainable goal, when it really isn’t. You can choose to be happy. You can decide that you no longer want to be miserable and change your mindset to happiness. But the main thing we forget about emotion is that you can’t control it all the time. There are times you feel upset and you cry. When you feel angry maybe you throw things and scream. You can’t always control your emotions sometimes they just take over in the moment. Happiness is just like those emotions and just like those emotions those feelings come and go. You’re not constantly angry or sad, just like you’re not constantly happy all the time either and that is okay.
The problem with wanting happiness is that you can’t always question if you’re happy sometimes you just need to live.
Buying particular items will not make you happy, learning certain things doesn’t guarantee bliss. Happiness is just something you are, or something you’re not. You can’t force happiness, just like you can’t force yourself to fit in with a group of people who you have no similarities with.
You can push yourself to be happy by appreciating what you do have, by not looking around at all you’ve been missing and by acknowledging the people in your life who always lift your spirits. You can exercise to release endorphins, you can try to sleep more or spend more time outdoors. There are plenty of lists out there suggesting to you how to live a happier life.
Often times we misconstrue the idea of happiness in pleasure, desire and positivity, but fulfilling those things does not usually make you happy.
We crave instant pleasure, but if you turn to anyone who has cheated on their partner, I can guarantee most will say they regret their decision in the long run, after the initial pleasure wears off they are filled with regret and shame, just like over eating or getting caught up in hard drugs.
The same thing goes for positive people. Sometimes the most positive and cheerful people are the furthest from finding happiness. They’ve gotten so used to being positive that it’s become the only way they live now and it turn they suppress their emotions and can become dysfunctional for not being in tune with their true feelings.
What people show on the outside doesn’t always correlate with how their really feeling on the inside.
Everything we want in life we would always like if it were bigger or better. We always upgrade because we think that will make us happier than the standard option. We always think if we have a bigger house then we would be happier, or if we had the newest model of the car that would make us more satisfied. But that isn’t always true. If you aren’t happy with something the way it is, upgrading won’t necessarily make you any happier. It will only make you greedier and need bigger and better in the future.
If you live that way you will always need more in order to be happy and sometimes that just isn’t possible.
The best advice I’ve ever received on becoming happy is to just live. To let life work out the way it is supposed to and appreciate all that I have in life. Dream big and do it because if you really want something you will work for it and in that time happiness will come.
Happiness is not something you achieve, but something you feel by living your best life.
So get off the couch, stop feeling sorry for yourself and start living. Let everything fall into place like it is supposed to do and live your best life. You can’t control everything, so just live.