How Learning From Criticism Will Ultimately Make You A Better Person
By Bria Barrows
If you spend your life in your own little bubble of false perfectionism, you will never know how long you have been walking around with issues that could be changed to make you into a better person.
For many of us, when it comes to our flaws and bad attributes and when people point them out to us, our reactions usually go towards defensive. Because as we all know, it is hard to accept when others point out things in ourselves that aren’t positive.
We don’t like it when someone says to us, “Hey, I’ve noticed you can be a bit self-centered,” or when someone points out that we constantly disrespect people’s time by being late for every function.
We truly get uncomfortable when others confront us with our truth because it is more comfortable to know that we have traits that are revered or acceptable.
I know for myself, people have confronted me about always talking about my issues and my problems. Times when yes, I would be going through a horrendous time, but also not stopping to realize that even though I may go through my own turmoil, others hurt and toil as well.
And I have gotten to the point in my life where I am not afraid to say that this type of behavior is just selfish.
It makes me into nothing more than a bratty person who just thinks about my needs but fails to acknowledge that I am just a spec in this world and that others exist as well.
The first time I was hit with this truth it definitely hurt me and sent me into a frenzy of trying to figure out where I had gone wrong as a person. I began to ask myself, Am I really self-centered? How have I hurt or affected others by this? Do I have any positive traits about myself at all then?
It truly bothered me that I was engaging in this type of behavior and I just wanted to fix it. So now, I consciously make a choice these days to think less about myself and more about others.
I genuinely ask people how they are now and when I am going through a tough time, I remember that other people struggle as well.
By me acknowledging that I have a problem and willfully accepting criticism, I made a change that would affect how I interact with others.
The thing with criticism is that in the moment, it never feels good. When someone shows you who you really are, you don’t want to believe it even and may be tempted to resist it altogether or get defensive.
It’s no wonder we have people in their 40s and 50s these days who have childish behavior and foul ways because they simply resisted looking deep within themselves and seeing how they truly are as a person.
So, If you struggle with coming to terms with flaws in your personality or others have criticized you for being a certain way, I call you to embrace this criticism because it is truly a blessing to be able to see who you really are, what you don’t like about yourself, and change it.
You become a better person when you are able to be criticized and accept this criticism and say to yourself, “Ok, now that I know this, how can I change this about myself?”
This is called maturity.
No one is perfect and we all have flaws in our personalities. But owning up to these imperfections and seeing how you can change them is what dictates how conscious you are as a person when it comes to growing and progressing in life and being the best version of yourself.
Criticism from others is never meant to hurt you. Even if it does, you grow in the process.
And at the end of it all, you become a better person.