I Deeply Relate To Disney Villains

By

Call me crazy, but I’ve always related to Disney villains more than I’ve ever related to the heroes. Let’s ignore for a second that the villains always got the super fun karaoke-night-worthy musical numbers or that they were the most fabulous characters in the entire movie. The real reason for relating to the bad guys in Disney movies is that these guys are always incredibly driven.

Disney Villains may not always have the best intentions, but they sure as hell know what they want and they’re willing to stop at nothing to get it. While the heroes and heroines stand on balconies and dream of better lives, love, and belonging, the villains dwell in caves and shadows, plotting and planning their way to power and success. They don’t wish upon stars to achieve their dreams, they kidnap and murder and steal their way to success. Who needs a Blue Fairy when you can whip up some black magic of your own?

In a lot of cases, Disney villains are the smartest characters in the entire movie. Okay, maybe not Gaston or any of the hulking womanizing baddies, but a lot of Disney villains were “evil” because they were smart, cunning, manipulative and knew they deserved more than what they were getting. Yes, I deeply related to that as a child. And yes, I may be a sociopath. The tests were inconclusive.

The villains are smooth. They slink around, grinning, making great jokes to their henchmen, and you know what? They’re chasing their dreams too, kids. Their ways of going after what they want might be frowned upon but at least they aren’t afraid to shoot for the moon. Sure, most of them fall to their deaths or get impaled by ships but at least they tried their hardest! Gold stars for all of you.

So what if Scar killed his brother! You know how many non-lion kings have been killed by their brothers for the throne? So what if Ursula stole Prince Eric and King Trident’s trident? Welcome to corporate America, where the baddest bitch will steal your man AND your job!

I will not be ashamed of how deeply I relate to the villains in Disney movies. They taught me how to be who I am today. Plan ahead. Try your hardest. Take what you want. Aim for the top. Don’t be afraid to crush some hopeful orphans along the way. Dark caves make great lairs. Decorating with skeletons can add depth to any room. And don’t be afraid to dance like no one is watching… because if they are, odds are you’re trying to kill them.