I Forgive You — But I Don’t Want Anything To Do With You

I never thought I would say these words but I forgive you. I am not happy about what happened. I am never going to be able to scrub my mind of our toxic memories. But I am not going to hold onto this grudge anymore.

I was pissed at you for such a long time and it slowly killed me inside. My anger turned me into a pessimistic person. It turned me into someone cynical and skeptical and bitter.

Holding onto my anger impacted me more than you. You didn’t suffer the same way that I did, because you didn’t care about anyone except for yourself. Staying mad at you was pointless. I was only hurting myself.

After all this time, I can finally say that I forgive you, because I deserve to move on from what happened. I deserve to let go of the past and proceed into my future with a clean slate.

I am ready to forgive you, because I have grown to pity you. I used to focus on all of the ways you have hurt me, but I never stopped to think about how difficult it must be for you to deal with your demons. You have made a million mistakes and even though you seem like you have no guilt, I am sure you blame yourself for everything you have lost. I am sure you have trouble falling asleep at night, knowing how many people you have hurt.

I am going to forgive you, because you don’t matter enough for me to keep crying over. I want you out of my mind for good. I want to stop dwelling on you, because you mean nothing to me. You are unimportant. You are irrelevant.

You proved what kind of person you really are, and instead of being angry with you for showing your true self, I should be thankful I have a chance to live without you. I should be happy I have plenty of time to get the hell away from you.

You just need to understand that, even though I forgive you, that does not mean I want you back in my life.

I want nothing to do with you. If you text me, I will block your number. If you show up at my front door, I will close all of the blinds. I don’t want you around me. You do not deserve a place in my life.

I am ready to forgive you — but I will never be ready to allow you back into my world. I have a soft enough heart to put the past in the past, but I am not an idiot. Talking to you again would not be nice of me. It would be stupid. It would only lead to more pain and I am done letting you hurt me. I am done with you, period.

I want you to know that I forgive you, I accept what happened between us, but I never want to see your face again.