I Had To Choose Between The Two Great Loves Of My Life

Based on stories I’ve heard and romantic comedies I’ve seen, I have experienced unbelievable, earth-shattering love. The kind of love that Nicholas Sparks creates; the love that takes your breath away, swallows you whole and there’s no escaping.

It consumes you.

And I’ve been fortunate enough to encounter this love not only once, but twice.

Once in 2007, when I took my first step in magical New York City and the other when I was just a little toddler eating her first happy meal.

As I ate my first cheeseburger and small fry, I came face to face with love for my very first time.

There’s no other way to describe the relationship I have with fast food other than one full of love. It’s a relationship that is filled with selflessness, happiness and joy. Every time I eat fast food the love grows stronger and our bond strengthens. Even when it’s not its best self, it still finds a way to impress me. It’s always been there for me, in times of sadness and cheerfulness.

However, as I’ve also heard and seen, great loves don’t always last a lifetime; sometimes, they’re meant to only last for a part of your life and leave with you great memories. That is the case with this certain relationship in my life.

Even the greatest of loves have their issues and this one was no exception, and in 2015, the relationship took a turn for the worse and became tumultuous. I started to resent fast food for taking all of my money, but it wasn’t the foods fault, it was mine. I was the one who continued to allow the relationship to go on. There were many times we became Ross and Rachel and took many breaks. But I couldn’t stay away, I found myself running back every chance I could.

And the undeniable truth hit as 2015 came to a close. I had to choose between my two great loves, fast food or New York.

Did I want to keep spending a near 400 dollars a month on fast food or did I want to save my money and move to the city I dreamt about living and working in?

I had to weigh the pros and cons of each.

Fast food gave me immediate satisfaction and happiness; New York — even if I had visited five times just in 2015 — wouldn’t bring me happiness for a whole year. But, if I could just wait for New York, hold out for it and give up the fast food, I could have a lifetime of happiness instead of a lifetime of resentfulness.

How could I just give up on something that had been in my life since I could remember; something that brought me so many wonderful memories?

Was I even strong enough to walk away?

As of today, I am strong enough.

I walked away December 31, 2015 (Taco Bell was my last rendezvous with fast food) and ended my eighteen year relationship with fast food. Even if it’s only been a month, its progress I never thought I’d be able to make.

It hurts every time I drive past a McDonalds, Wendy’s or any other beautiful fast food establishment, but it’s also empowering. It feels damn good to know that I have 400 dollars sitting in the bank that I normally wouldn’t have if fast food was still in my life.

Fast food brought me many memories, and I had a blast; it’s the first love that I will never forget but, New York stands for my future and will better my life.

New York will be my last love; it’s the love I want to grow old and die with.