I Should Have Known From The Start I Would Fall Too Deep


I should’ve known from the start that falling for your eyes would only drown me in your tears. I got captivated by the way they blink every time a bee stings, and how starry they are when the night is dark and the moon rises. I got captured by the way your eyes filled the ocean; with a streaming salty clear and the wave of your miserable feelings.

I should’ve known from the start that the same will always be different. That the right thing couldn’t come out of something so wrong.

But how could I have seen it at the very beginning when my stare lingered into your broken soul?

I was too busy smelling your comfortable familiarity to even put some senses into my mind. I was letting my hand trace every hard line, bruised knuckle, and cracked voice of yours, until I could no longer help myself. To kiss the pain away; to kill the sadness off; to be the band aid to your wounds; to melt my bones and fill the void of yours.

I should’ve known from the start that I would end up falling too deep.

Falling is never my problem; the goosebumps, the rush, the thrill of not knowing where will I land, I enjoy. I’d love to fall for you all over again. Only if I could, only if I wanted to.

Falling is one thing, being the only one who falls is another.

I should’ve seen it coming. From the way your figure radiates the warmth I am longing for; your raspy laugh that I cannot ignore; the painfully strange fragrance I’ve grown to know; the rigid glance you throw over.

You slipped into me, messing the inside of my skull up.

I should’ve known from the start that I would be the only one ruined. Totally, tragically, miserably ruined by you.

I caught a glimpse of fire in your eyes and I held onto it ever since. I thought I was smart enough to prepare for all of the water needed to stop the wildfire. It turns out that your charm is much smarter.

It didn’t make the fire bigger, it’s keeping it as a flicker; blaming enough to light the way, warm enough to keep me closely stay.

And my water turned into a fucking tsunami ended up drowning me.

I should’ve known from the start, but how could I?