I’m Not Afraid Of You

I’m not afraid of you.
I’d take your cigarette burns
over your love letters.
Paper cuts can hurt like hell,
but they don’t leave scars.
If you’re gonna hurt me,
leave me with something I can take with me;
Souvenirs
of everything I’ve ever felt.

I’d take your slip knots
over your pinkie promises;
Illusion of stability
over a prison cell
disguised as love.
This Stockholm Syndrome heart
has called too many abandoned structures
Home.
So hold me hostage
somewhere
that makes me appreciate my own pulse.

Give me a handful of your
tomorrow, maybes
over their version of forever.
I want it to hurt.
Give me right now
instead taking futures we are not guaranteed
for granted.

I’d rather feel it
than live inside of the lines of Hollywood’s
interpretation of romance.
Fuck their white picket fence.
Give me your graffiti.
Give me your broken skylines
haunted by ghosts
you never learned how to let go.
Let’s exercise our demons
together.
They all have
the same names,
they call the same places
home.

I’d take your dirty looks
over your fake smiles;
Your authenticity
over your approval.
Give me your correction
over your praise.
Help me grow,
don’t put me on display
in a vile of water
on your kitchen table
where I’ll watch you choke.
Give me fake glass jewels
sharp enough to cut ourselves on
because we’re both just
diamonds in the rough.
I’m not asking for everything.
I just want you,
because you
have always been enough.

I’ll take hard times
over smooth-sailing.
I wanna learn
how to swim,
or drown in the parts of you
you were too scared
to show anyone else.
You just gotta let me in.
Because baby,
in your darkest moments,
I know exactly how you felt.

Fuck their Heaven.
give me your Hell.
I’m not afraid of you.