I’m Not Perfect For You, But One Day I Will Be

I’m not the one you pictured yourself with. In fact, someone who’s pretty much the complete opposite of me, is the person you’ve always dreamt about. And I can never be that someone, not even if I wanted to. I’m not your type. Yet, something in me caught your attention. You found my love for life attractive and you admired my story. My body wasn’t your cup of tea but my movement was your favorite flavor.

I’m different than what you’re used to. You’re fluent in what’s causal, shallow and temporary. I’m obsessed with depth, connection and intimacy.

You like to brush things off, you like to keep feelings inside. And I like to talk about them, I like to share them with the world. You’re used to being treated like an option and I made you a priority. You’re used to not meaning something to people and to me, you mattered. You’re used to being invisible but I saw you. And you’re used to being someone’s world for the wrong reasons. But for me, you were mine for the right ones.

I’ll be perfect for you when you don’t hear from me anymore. When you can’t afford my attention, when you can’t buy my love. I’ll be perfect when my snapchats disappear. I’ll be perfect when my smile doesn’t involve you, when you don’t complete my happiness. I’ll be perfect in your eyes when I’m at all the places we said we’ll be. I’ll be perfect for you when all your empty tries to replace me fall short. Sure thing you’ll enjoy someone hotter than me. You’ll build a foundation with someone less complicated and more compromising. You’ll get better ego boosts and you’ll get the peace of mind you wanted from me. You’ll get better sleep but that will be for a little while.

Because I’ll be perfect for you when you finally find your perfect and realize they’re not perfect, not for you, not at all. Because you’ll realize that although I wasn’t what you wanted, I indeed was what you needed.

I was the person you need to call you out when you’re being selfish, to remind you of where you’re coming from when you lose your purpose. I was the person who showed you that family is everything when you were giving-up on it. I was the person who restored your faith in loyalty when you expected me to betray you the most. I was the person who proved to you that real isn’t just a word.

And I’ll be perfect for you when you miss the things about me that were imperfect then. My questions, they made you seek for truth, identity and value. The little gestures, they made you feel wanted. The silliness, it gave you room to relax, forget and live the moment. The love, it changed you.

Only then, I’ll be perfect for you.. When you realize that perfect doesn’t look perfect at all, when you look for it everywhere but can’t find it because it’s something that comes from within.