I’m So Embarrassed I Let Myself Fall For You

I’m already imagining how hard I am going to cringe in a few years when I remember how upset I let myself get over losing you. You are the romantic equivalent of my middle school fashion choices. I’ll blame it on my youth, but the truth is I should have known better.

You were nothing if not an endless parade of red flags and it is a testament to my optimistic nature that I went on explaining them away for so long.

You have no idea how bewildered my friends are by my feelings. They know who I am and they know the kind of person I should be with, and it just doesn’t align with what they’ve seen from you. I have begged them to give you second chances. I have explained again and again what I see in you, and it only came back to bite me.

I spent so much time making excuses for you, using my imagination to figure out ways we could make it work. I believed in us, and I wanted us to work, but I should have always known that was an impossible dream. The writing was always on the wall. You can’t have one person who cares and one person who doesn’t. You can’t have one person who is intelligent, giving, and supportive — and another who only knows how to take.

You are just a lesson learned the hard way. One I won’t even want to tell people I had to learn because this kind of stuff is supposed to be obvious: “don’t give your love to people who don’t deserve it”. I have good values and I know how to tell if someone is a good person, but you blinded me. It won’t happen again.