I’m Sorry I Cannot Save You

I am slowly starting to accept that I cannot fix you. I cannot save you.

I’m sorry I don’t know how to love you the way you need to be loved right now. Do you even know how you want to be loved? I know you cannot love yourself, and I wish I could save you from yourself, but I cannot.

I am slowly starting to take the pressure off of myself to be perfect enough to heal you.

We’re just two beings totally alone while sitting right beside each other.

I know you’re at your worst, and you may not mean the things you say, but they still hurt like hell to hear. I can forgive you for treating me the way you feel about yourself, but even that will not save you.

I will keep smiling in hopes that it will make you smile. I will hide my tears behind closed doors in hopes that it will make you feel stronger. I will hold on until I weaken from giving you my everything. I will be here for you, in hopes that you will somehow find your way back to me. I will give you my all, until I have nothing left. But it will not save you.

I can put my feelings aside, push them down to be strong for you, but it will not save you.

I can make sure you eat, try to get you out of bed and into the sun, seeing friends, but you have to learn to save yourself. Unfortunately, I alone cannot save you.

I will do my best believe in us in hopes that you will too. And I will have hope, because without it, I will become less of a shell than you have become. I will have hope. But I cannot save you.

I can give it my absolute best, but I have finally realized that even then, I cannot save you. And I am so sorry that I can’t.