Inner Monologue Of Going For A Run


Has it been an hour since I had lunch yet?

I have three big slices of pizza to digest though, so maybe I should wait an extra hour today.

Will it start raining before I’m done running?

I don’t want to get stuck in a thunderstorm, catch a cold and not be able to run for the next month.

There’s not a cloud in the sky for now, but let me check the weather app just in case.

Mostly sunny with zero chance of rain for the next three days.

All clear, damnit.

Looks like the perfect day for running.

Yay? It looks a little chilly outside though.

Do I need a jacket, or is a long sleeve shirt enough?

I don’t want to overheat though, so maybe a long sleeve shirt with shorts? Or a tank top with running tights? So many combinations to choose from!

Someone once told me that having to make a lot of decisions depletes your motivation. Okay, whatever.

I’m wearing a t-shirt and shorts.

I have dinner plans tonight at 6 and it’s 3:30 now.

I need a half hour to stretch, take a shower and get ready, and another half hour to get to the restaurant. That means I can run for an hour and a half.

I can squeeze in at least a 10 miler.

Alright, I’d better get going then.

Holy shit, it’s burning hot. I’m too lazy to go back though.

I can just roll up my short sleeves and that’s the same thing as changing into a tank top.

Why is my iPod shuffling all slow songs right now? Give me something a little more fast paced.

It’s only been 5 minutes but my fingers are already too sweaty to control my iPod, so I have to endure this crap selection.

Why don’t I have a go-to running playlist like everyone else? It’s not that hard.

My left sleeve keeps falling down and I’m tired of rolling it back up every 15 seconds.

I’ll just leave both of my sleeves down.

They have to be even, obviously.

Alright, I’ve had enough. If another ballad comes up on shuffle I’m hitching a cab home.


Running is such a repetitive motion.

Why did people start running?

I mean, I know that pre-civilization homo sapiens ran to catch animals to eat. But why did people start running recreationally and competitively, like in the Olympics?

Why do people intentionally put themselves through such agonizing pain and suffering?

Get jazzy on it… This is my jam!

I’m so glad Jason came up on shuffle, just when I needed him the most. Good things really do come to those who wait.

I’m going to run a bit slower so I can sing along. Been around the world *gasp* don’t speak the language! But your *gasp* booty don’t need explaining!

Dammit, I can’t breathe.