Justin Bieber Drops “N” Bomb, Apologizes With Bible Verses
By Jim Goad
As everyone knows, Justin Bieber is the most talented, dynamic, and exciting Caucasian pop singer performing watered-down black music of our generation—and possibly of all time.
That’s why it was a shame, a tragedy, an outrage, a scandal, a disappointment, a dishonor, and a taint on the national soul that this young gentlemen was outed today as a fucking goddamned asshole jerkoff scumbag piece-of-shit RACIST when video emerged of him using the horrible, horrible, HORRIBLE “N” word—and I’m not talkin’ ’bout “nougat”—in substitution for the much more benign and agreeable word “girl” in a remake of his beautiful and inspirational song “One Less Lonely Girl”:
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYuIoFai3Sw?feature=player_detailpage&w=584&h=328]
In case tears are streaming down your cheeks and accidentally clogged your eardrums, let me transcribe what this subhuman monster was singing there:
One less lonely (BLEEP)
One less lonely (BLEEP)
One less lonely (BLEEP)
There’s gonna be one less (BLEEP)
If I kill you
I’ll be part of the KKK
There’ll be one less lonely (BLEEP)
There’ll gonna [sic] be one less lonely (BLEEP)
Who the FUCK says “BLEEP” that many times and doesn’t expect to be lynched for it? And he was LAUGHING the whole time? What the (BLEEP)? Seriously—what the (BLEEP)?
I honestly am shaking my damn head now. After all we’ve been through as a nation and a world and a solar system and a galaxy and a universe, why do all of our pop stars still want to join the KKK and kill black people? Don’t they realize black people invented cotton and peanut butter and basketball and turntable scratching and racial humor?
Granted, this damning and unforgivable video was filmed when Bieber was a wee lad of fourteen, before his voice had changed and likely even before his testicles had descended. But does that make it forgivable?!? Not bloody likely!
The video emerged today, and in the face of the blacklash backlash that occurred, Bieber or one of his handlers issued a snapshot of Bible verses on his Instagram account:
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I have news for you, Beebs—GOD IS BLACK. Jesus, too, is black. As far as I can tell from pictures, the Holy Ghost is at least a mulatto. There will be NO forgiveness. It is time for you to sell your basketball team and leave planet Earth to the one true race—the human race. And we are ALL human. Except you.