Literally Just 12 Alternate ‘Friends’ Episodes I Made Up While I Was High


1. The One Where everyone’s back together again

Watch as the gang gets back together for a revival propaganda piece to distract the nation! Everyone who works on the show is held at gunpoint! America laughs!

2. The One Where Rachel tries to meditate and accidentally freezes time

A little meditation can go a long way, but not if you’re that stupid. Ross ends up with a lot of dicks drawn on his face.

3. The One Where Chandler gets destroyed so Ross can become more powerful

I have no memory of my thought process while I was writing this. Nothing makes sense anymore. Everyone is doomed.

4. The One With Joey’s lost innocence

He was a boy. She was a girl. Nay, she was a woman. But he was still a boy. A thousand think-pieces are spawned.

5. The One Where everyone gets PTSD

The gang sits at Central Perk, remembering every guest star who has now been accused of sexual assault. Happy memories are destroyed. Nothing will ever be the same.

6. The One With six Phoebes and nothing else

No official synopsis given.

7. The One Where Mike spends 20 minutes Away from these horrible people and Paul Rudd gets nominated for an Emmy

Did you know that Mike is a very depressed person? Watch as he aimlessly walks around New York contemplating suicide! Lena Dunham directs.

8. The One Where Will & Grace cross over and just fucking tear everyone a new one

You know that Grace will end up singing until everyone’s head explodes and Karen will bathe in their blood.

9. The One With All The Problems

A clip-show episode, showcasing every single hilariously offensive joke ever told on Friends. Get triggered, America! We’re owning up to our shit (but don’t plan on doing anything about it)!

10. The One With the Reveal

Everything that’s ever happened is a fever dream of Valerie Cherish. The truth is out. Everyone’s aware. The lights go out.

11. The One With the Glitch

Who will help Monica get unstuck, when EVERYBODY’S stuck?!

12. The One With the Last Chance

Season finale. The Great Glitch of Consciousness has created an infinite number of realities crashing on each other, testing the limits of infinity itself. The President of NBC saves the day, but informs the gang that this is their last available reality. One more screw-up and the universe is undone. Realizing they’ve all held each other back, the friends decide to part ways and try out living actual human lives. The world is saved.