My Mind Has Three Corners: The Happy, The Sad, And The One Where Monsters Roam Freely

People rarely visit the third one. I never let them. I know they’ll start running away, screaming, cowering away from me. When that happens, more monsters come for me. And one can only take too much.

I am panting now, as I have just finished defeating another monster. But as I look around, I see more of them coming.

Sometimes, I escape, ending up in the happy side.

It’s bright in here, like I’m inside the sun. But the warmth is just enough, comforting even. As I wander through it, I slowly realize I’m at the end, staring at the streets of sadness.

I stroll through them, biding my time. It’s quiet and dark here, like the night. Yet, there’s a sense of calm and peace in it. If you look at the sky, it’ll always be starless. The clouds always blocked everything, even the moon. I feel the cold and damp feeling in my face. It’s raining again. It always seemed to rain in this  part of my mind. I never danced to it though. I just let the drops of water rest on my skin.

I walk once again.

That’s when I hear them, the monsters.

I’m near the third corner.

I take out my dagger. The reflection of my face shocks me. Sometimes, the person staring back at me doesn’t even look like me anymore.

I cringe as I remember all those times someone fought by my side. It’s not that I am not thankful to them, it’s just that once I open the doors to the third corner of my mind, they’ll be there waiting. They’ve become one of the monsters that I fought hard to kill. How do I even kill  them when they once fought for me?

A sigh escapes my mouth. I am here once again. The doors are what you’d imagine darkness to be. It pulls you in, sucking all the good in anyone.

I raise my dagger, readying myself for the fight. My reflection on it falters.

Sometimes I’m standing on two corners of my mind, at the same time.

How can I be happy and sad at the same time?

Perhaps I’m mad.

I’m going mad.

I shake my head, focus on my reflection and turn the knob. The cold wind welcomes me. The smell of regret is everywhere. There’s no turning back.

As I charge and set myself for battle, my grip on the dagger loosens.

What if I end it all now? One quick slash and everything will be gone. No more monsters. No regrets. No pain, just nothing.

“Don’t.”

The voice brings me back. I look around and see him in a far distance, killing monsters as if it were his own.

A monster emerges from my right and I quickly dodge it.

It was doubt.

After everyone that ever betrayed me, how could I ever trust again?

I bring my dagger down on the monster.

I fight and fight, tasting blood in my mouth.

I feel a hand on my shoulder.

“Hey. You’re okay now. You’re okay.”

His warmth brings us back to the happy corner.

“What happened?” I was lying on his lap.

“It’s over. No more fighting.”

“You mean it’s over for now. No matter how hard I try to escape that place, I always come back to it.” There were clouds beginning to form in the sky.

“You won’t be alone now. Whenever you come to that place, you won’t be alone.”

A monster emerges right before our eyes. I take out my dagger. But before I can even stand up and fight, there were soft lips on mine.

Right before I close my eyes and get lost in his warmth, I see the monster fall and turn into ash.