Stop Making Excuses For Toxic People In Your Life
By Kris Miller
There’s this theme I’ve seen lately in the lives of everyone I care about. It’s one that is equally frustrating and painful — something that hurts me to see ones I love struggle with.
It’s complaining about the fuckboy, but continuing to entertain the idea of him.
It’s being upset that a fake friend is rude to you, but still agreeing to brunch in the morning.
It’s making excuses for family members who abuse you just because they are related to you.
Toxic people are in your life because you allow them to be.
On one hand, I get it. Loving someone, even if they are detrimental to your mental health, is not easy to stop. There’s not a switch you can flick and easily walk away, no strings attached. It’s a laborious process and is confusing. There’s no right way to do it.
But you have to realize it.
You have to accept it and acknowledge it and hopefully eventually verbalize it. Toxic people often do not know they are toxic. They are emotional vampires, sucking the life out of you. And you make excuses for them. You find parts of yourself to blame or situational aspects. And yes, it can often be a grey area. But you cannot shoulder the responsibility for people hurting you.
You deserve to be treated with kindness and dignity. I promise, you do. It’s okay to say that. It’s okay to ask for what you’re worth and evaluate which relationships are worth maintaining. It’s okay to admit you want something better than what you currently have.
I want you to know that. I want you to know it’s okay to let go.