The 4 Most Important Dating Tips For Men Who Have No Clue What They’re Doing
By Jenna Hushka
1. Ask her on the damn date.
It’s interesting how we have this expectation that all men are lining up to ask women on dates. We just assume that boy meets girl he fancies, girl fancies boy in return, therefore boy asks girl on date. False.
For some reason, it has come to a more like a metaphorical dance around the ask. A combination of flirty texts, maybe some sprinkled hints of doing activities together, but when it comes down to it, most men fail to actually ask a woman out on a date.
Believe it or not, a lot of women simply want a man to ask her on a damn date. It doesn’t have to be no Morton’s Steak dinner, but a simple invitation to grab drinks will do. It could be at a coffee shop with the best Yelp reviews in your city. Heck, you could bring a bottle of wine to a place in your city with a nice view. A little effort and the proof of the ask will go a long way.
2. Tell. Her. She’s. Pretty.
I have learned that women are doing their best on the self-love scale. We bring ourselves up in this era with positive self-talk, beauty products, face masks, and so on.
But the underlying dark truth is that women are still told they are not beautiful every day. All the time. Not always verbally of course, but through social media. Through the ad of the 5’8 model with silk hair. Through the girl in her bikini with a better bum then she’ll ever have. Through any kind of commercial that shows a done up woman.
The bottom line is, we have to work hard to believe we are beautiful at all times. So men, the most important if not most appreciated little thing you can do is compliment.
It may sound shallow, but at the end of the day, every woman wants to feel beautiful.
3. Recognize that women sometimes do women things.
It may not be a surprise, but women are different than men. And this sometimes means we have different habits, routines, etc. Some women like their makeup. Some women swear by their 40-minute bubble baths. Some women like sitting in their towels for 4 hours straight. The best thing you can do is be respectful of our sometimes slightly annoying but needed habits. Don’t whine, don’t express your annoyance, but rather understand, accept and let us do our womanly things in peace.
4. Don’t forget: reassurance goes far.
Women are prone to overthinking. We overthink everything from the shoes we chose this morning to the way you said you liked our hair. When it comes to dating and how you feel towards us, we overthink everything.
But you mustn’t blame her. When it comes down to relationships, women often overthink because they didn’t think hard enough when someone hurt them in the past.
We overthink to protect ourselves from ultimately getting hurt again. It may seem ridiculous if she asks you for the fifth time that week if you are positive that you want to go on that Saturday night date. We need to know that you are not thinking about your ex. We need to be reassured of where you are at mentally and emotionally in this dating experience.
While of course, there’s a certain point where giving too much reassurance can become toxic, do keep it in mind.
Basically, just remember: You water plants often, not just once. That should be the same way you think of her heart.
That should be the same way you think of dating.