The Difference Between ‘Toxic’ And ‘Divine’ Masculinity

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The past few years have made me ask myself very deep questions about what it means to be a man in this day and age. Is all masculinity, I wondered, really toxic? I didn’t want to continue perpetuating unconscious (and perhaps harmful) behavior and stereotypes that had been passed down to me from a male-dominated society. I knew there must be another way.

Was it possible, I wondered, that just as there is a Divine Feminine, that there is also a Divine Masculine? So I started evaluating my own behavior. I started talking about gender with a diverse group of people: men, women, nonbinary, gay, straight, and trans. I even started studying tantra and learning how male and female energies have nothing to do with gender – they are both inside us all.

Here are some of my biggest conclusions:

1. I think one of the biggest reasons the world is so out of balance today is because the masculine/feminine energies are out of balance. Sexual energy is literally Yin and Yang. We need both in equal balance to be in harmony.⁣

2. What people call the “patriarchy” is the real, systematic suppression of feminine Yin energy that has been taking place for centuries. As our collective awareness rises to a new level of consciousness, we are now in a position to heal and protect the Yin and restore balance to the world.⁣

⁣3. Sexual energy (Yin and Yang) is not exclusive to ANY gender. Every human – whether man, woman, gay, straight, trans, nonbianry, or otherwise – has within them both masculine and feminine energy. Yin is the receptive, the soft, the fluid. Yang is the forceful, the strong, the steady. When Yin is suppressed and Yang is unchecked, we ALL suffer.⁣

4.⁣ Masculinity is not inherently toxic. Just as there is a Divine Feminine, there is a Divine Masculine. But when masculinity is not integrated with an equal and opposite femininity (like a warrior without discipline or wisdom), it will express itself in toxic ways.⁣

5.⁣ Men who feel triggered by the feminist movement are missing the point. Sure, like anything that becomes politicized, we can quibble about the details, but the core of feminism is literally about RESTORING BALANCE TO THE WORLD. It’s about energy, not politics. Awakened, embodied men do not oppose feminism just because they heard a statistic that debunks the gender pay gap.⁣

The bottom line:⁣ The role of Divine Masculinity (regardless of gender) is to hold a protective space for Yin to flourish, just like a farmer tending sacred soil.⁣ May these energies move and dance together in divine harmony.