The First Time You Face Rejection


In life everyone, at one time or another, feels rejection. Rejection as defined in the English dictionary is the “the dismissing or refusing of a proposal, idea, etc.” I bet we all wish that the English dictionary definition is the only way we’ve felt rejected. “Aw, man someone didn’t listen to my idea in class today, I feel so rejected!” Truth is, that is really only the very outer layer of the word.

In reality, rejection means something different to every person who has ever experienced it. Whether it is rejection from a college, rejection in school, rejection by a friend or crush, the feeling is something we hope and pray will never strike again.

I was 12 years old when I first felt “rejected.” The story goes a little something like this:

Girl likes boy.
Girl wants boy to like her back.
Boy likes another girl.
Girl is crushed. Welp.

The first time I ever cried due to rejection was because of a BOY. I cannot fathom the idea of tears over a boy at 12 years old but let me tell you, those tears were real. They were more real than anything I have ever experienced. It was raw, genuine emotion rushing over me and I had absolutely no idea why.

Now that I look back on the situation, I know exactly why I cried. I cried because I felt unloved. Unworthy. Little. I felt like I would never be good enough to deserve the kind of attention that other girl so effortlessly obtained from what I thought was MY man!

Now, I know that is a very juvenile experience of rejection, but trust me the feeling only gets worse as you get older and the situations get more real. As I got older, I felt the feeling many more times but in different situations. But I never understood why it hurt so much until now. Rejection leaves a lasting impression on us. Especially the first time we ever feel it. There are not nearly enough consoling words to mend our broken hearts and basically life in itself feels like it has come to a major halt.

Trust me, it has not. Rejection is a part of living. You need it to amount to the person you are or will become some day. It is quintessential in growing up and facing the real world.

I won’t lie and say that it gets easier to deal with, it doesn’t. But I can say you learn how to deal with it. You become stronger from that experience that at one time made you feel so damn weak. You learn to take the world for what it is and by doing so you better yourself. Do not dwell on what could have happened or what would have happened, because that is not a way to live. Instead, dwell on the moments that have made you feel joy and laughter. Don’t view rejection as a way of life, but as a way of getting you to the life you were always meant to live.

featured image – He’s Just Not That Into You