The Reality Of Death


I’ve always feared Death, who doesn’t? If I am going to ask you what your utmost fear is, I’m pretty sure almost all of you would answer Death or that losing a loved one, but according to John Green’s book ‘The Fault in our Stars’, we don’t actually fear death itself, what we are really scared of is oblivion.

If we die, would people still remember us for the next years to come? Have we done something worth remembering for the people we will leave behind? How about for the next generations to come?

Have we done something grand for these people to commemorate us? It’s this fear that once we die, it’s the end of the road for us, game over, we’re done. Death is actually not that hard to imagine, you just stop breathing and that’s it, but what comes next after we die? That’s a question no one really knows. Is there really heaven or hell? We cling to that belief that heaven is where the good people go, so we must do things as humanely good as possible. But the thing is, as human beings, we are prone to temptations. In a way, the saying “dying is actually a lot easier than living”, somehow, makes sense.

Death is one concrete example that we have no control over the things that are happening around us, we’ll never know when our last breath would be. It leaves us with a heartache no one could heal; as time passes that sorrow and longing will always remain. As scary as it may be and as hard as it is to accept the loss of a loved one; we have to choose to continue living for that person.

I’m writing this because, we recently lost a precious gem in the family, for someone who had lost a loved one, it is indeed heartbreaking. I can’t help but ask WHY? Why so sudden?

There are far more sinful persons in the world, there are criminals, rapists, drug addicts, why the person with such genuine heart? Why the person who is loved and treasured by many? Why the person who gives joy and inspires many people? We may not yet understand why this event happened, but this must be a part of God’s plan for us. I guess he needed another angel to help him in heaven, or that God loves him even more that’s why he called him up there, no more pain, no more sufferings.

This is also for the people who had lost a confidant, a best friend, a family member, and a partner. Nothing hurts most than knowing that you will not be able to see them again, touch them, feel them or even hear their voice again. Losing a loved one reminds you how so little time we have in this world, it makes you want to reflect on life. It makes you want to value your life and the people around you even more, appreciate every little thing around you.

Losing a loved one leaves you with guilt, that if you only knew it would happen sooner, you would have cherished every moment you had with that person, you would have showed him/her how thankful you are and how much you love that person. It serves as a wakeup call that we must not be afraid to show people how important they are for us.

So for my family, and for all the people who are mourning the loss of a loved one, I’m leaving you with this poem:

“He Is Not Dead.
I cannot say, and I will not say
That he is dead. He is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
For an old-time step, and the glad return,
Think of him faring on, as dear
In the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
He is not dead—he is just away.”

― James Whitcomb Riley

Because we don’t have to say goodbye, we’d rather say “SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE!”