The Secret To Getting Revenge On That Ex You Can’t Stop Thinking About

Get revenge by making your ex look like a total and complete idiot — by making him feel like a fool for leaving someone like you.

But you aren’t going to do that by slashing his tires, sending him angry drunken texts, or slandering him on social media.

No. You’ll get your revenge by deleting him from social media. By making him wonder where you’ve gone and where you’re going. By making him realize that you’re out of his life — not just as a girlfriend, or as a friend, but as a person. You’re gone and you’re not coming back. Not for him. Not even if he begs you.

Get revenge by being selfish. By focusing everything you have on advancing your own happiness. By cultivating your talents to become a better artisan, by stepping outdoors and allowing your soul to reconnect with nature, by spending time in an empty room and letting your lungs learn to breathe without him.

Get revenge by becoming friends with your reflection. Don’t be afraid of giving into that tired cliche of cutting your hair — as long as you’re doing it for you and not for him. Don’t bleach it, because he liked blondes. Chop it all off, because you’ve always wondered what you’d look like with a pixie cut and you finally have the courage to make a change.

Get revenge by living the best life that you can. A life that doesn’t involve rebound boys or midnight tears. A life that is more beautiful than the one you would have lived if he was still around to anchor you into place.

Get revenge by being a mature woman that doesn’t have to sink low and list out all of the reasons why he made a mistake. He’ll be able to see what he’s missing one day, when your name pops into his head and he searches for your Facebook page. Or when he unexpectedly crosses your path at your local mall. Or when he’s browsing the bookstore and sees your face on the back cover of a bestseller.

He might not see what he’s missing right now, right this second while you’re picturing his face and the way his flesh felt, but he will. One day, he will.

So be patient. Wait to get your revenge. And be comforted by the fact that, by the time you get it, you won’t even care about it. Because you won’t care about him.