This Is Why I Don’t Believe In Love At First Sight

I have never believed in love at first sight. I cannot believe that you can look at someone and know that they are everything you have ever been looking for. Yes, you can look at someone and feel a certain connection (I call it attraction) with them, but love? No, definitely not love.

Love is not the initial passion and longing that you feel for someone during the first few months of knowing them. Love is when you know a person inside out – the good, the bad, and the ugly; and yet find yourself falling for all of their shortcomings.

You like someone because of what you see in them, you love someone despite what you see in them.

Perhaps, this is why love is considered to be a complicated phenomenon – something that no science can explain with 100% accuracy nor any school can educate you about its intricacies.

Proponents of love at first sight often use the over-romanticized quote – “But we fell in love with our mother at first sight!” to win arguments in favor of their philosophy. I beg to differ. We did not fall in love with our mothers at first sight. Even before we saw our mothers, we felt her love, care, and protection through the womb. The nine odd months during which our mothers carried us in their wombs, gave us a chance to know their heartbeat and gave them a chance to know ours. Together we went through a lot of good and bad phases during the pregnancy. Please do not write off the soul bonding connection that happened during these nine months as ‘love at first sight’

I probably would have never written anything against love at first sight had I not seen how many of us use it as an excuse to carry around dead relationships. Often, people under the delusion of the connection they felt at first sight with someone, allowing the other person to treat them like dirt. They think that this connection that they initially felt is fated and continue to endure abuse – both physical and mental. Yes, it is true that it is very rare to feel a connection with someone during the first meeting.

But if you give real love a chance, you will realize that often connections are felt only after you have known a person for long enough to know their ugly side and get comfortable enough to show them yours!