This Is Why ‘Loving’ You Long-Distance Just Wasn’t Enough

You used your passport
for the first time
to meet me

After nine days
you told me
you were
in love

I did not know
whether
you were
enough

But at the airport
I cried and
I cried
as if I
already could
not live
without you

You called
from pay phones
we were
living in separate
countries
we were
2462.44 miles
apart

Those miles
would kill you
you told me
I laughed
at my own
independence

You said I should
need you
should
call you
the moment
I got home
should wake you
in the middle
of the night

I was
your reason
for buying
your first
cell phone
for falling asleep
with it
in your hand

My separate life
made you
uneasy
but that
would not be
wise I said
to need you

I did not say
what I was looking
for were more
ways to fall
in love

I admit that was
irresponsible
I should have
told you I was
never sure
our lives were
enough
alike

Our visions
in fact I was
almost certain
they were not
even close
to compatible

You took a bus
from Montreal
and I flew
from LA

In Brooklyn
we kissed
in photo
booths

We bought frames
to put in our
separate
bedrooms
to place
on our
separate
shelves

Together we took
comfort
in hotel living
in bathrobes
in closing
our door
and keeping
the world
out

We had no sense
of reality
months would go
by without our
touching

We got used
to sending
photographs
then videos

Our separate
bodies teasing
themselves in
separate
tubs

That this was
okay eventually
made me feel
like I was
drowning.