What Every Christian Should Remember About Love
By Deanne Sibal
“Love is patient.”
Life will always have its fair share of downs with the up. If you love someone, you should understand that there will be hard times and love is sticking with them through those times. Love isn’t just about the good times, it’s about everything that’s happening and appreciating each moment – good or bad.
“Love is kind.”
Kindness, it is a very rare trait in a world so focused on materialistic ambitions. Kindness is wanting to help someone without agenda. And love should always be kind. If you love someone, you should encourage them, motivate them without waiting for anything in return. Loving someone is wanting the best for a person and helping them be the best version of themselves without wanting anything in return. You just do it because you love the person, no agendas.
“Love does not envy, it does not boast and it is not proud.”
Love should never make you feel inadequate and insecure about yourself that you compare yourself to someone else. It should empower you and make you feel complete. It should give you the reassurance that you are enough, and doubts should not be a part of the equation. Because if you are secure with yourself and the love you have, you would find no need to have outlandish actions to show off your relationship. You will not need to showcase every single movement and accomplishment your relationship reaches if security is there. And love should always be humble. Pride should never be part of the equation; pride is one of the main reasons for many men’s downfall. It is an unnecessary in love for one to build a wall of pride. No loves is worth risking for someone’s pride.
“Love does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
This is a vital part of the definition of love. The way a person talks about a past lover, if he or she has one, would define the person’s real character. A person who is filled with love would not think of the negative traits of people, instead see the good in them. And for someone to speak of a past lover with fondness and positivity shows the appreciation of life itself that can only be seen with love. Instead of letting the bitterness overcome them, people filled with love are instead thankful for the beautiful memories and lessons they have gained. The way your past lover treats you is a testament of the sincerity of their love for me. (I do believe that past lovers may part without ill feelings for each other because I have done it personally with an open heart and mind.) Love is not self-seeking, it should never be selfish. You cannot claim to have loved someone and just dump them when their existence no longer benefits yours. But, do not mistake love for setting with negativity and toxicity. Love is doing something because it will be the best for the BOTH of you, not just yourself. If a person claims they love you and yet abandons you when you no longer prove useful in their life, then you must reflect if it was real love. Love will also teach you to be forgiving. It will teach you that people will hurt you, but, it doesn’t mean you should hurt them back. A person filled with love knows that holding grudges benefits no one and corrupts a person’s heart and soul.
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.”
Love is a pure treasure. It will encourage you to be the best version of yourself. If a person loves you, he or she will motivate you to be a better person. He or she will continuously give you reasons to grow and be better. He or she will tell you when you’re starting to wander off the right path. Tolerating vices and bad habits is not an option. He or she will understand you but will do their best to motivate you to throw away the things bad for your mind, body, and soul. Love without honesty is doomed. If a person loves you, he or she will be completely honest with you. They will tell you when you are wrong, and they will admit it when they’re wrong. Trust is a basic foundation of love, and it is built on honesty and loyalty.
“Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
Love is a strong thing. It has the ability to give you strength, to give you hope. If you find someone who makes you feel safe, protected and hopeful, keep that person. If you find him or her who gives you the strength and motivation to reach your dreams and goals, treasure him or her. It’s not every day you’ll meet someone like that. If you meet a person who does what love should do, pray and thank God.
Love shouldn’t just be a feeling, it is something more profound than just an attraction between two people. Don’t just look for love. Understand love, cherish the agape kind of love, be its embodiment and it will come to you on its own.
And if you still don’t understand what love should be, look at the cross. Look at the Savior who selflessly gave up His life for us.