What I Hope Meeting My Person Will Be Like

Oh man do we have a plethora of material and vocabulary on the different ways that guys leave us girls hanging these days. I’ve also had enough heartbroken dudes asking me for advice on how to cope with a shattered “almost” relationship because let’s face it, we hardly even make it there these days. It’s important to remain hopeful in these times though so here’s how I hope meeting my next romance goes.

I hope that we meet at something that I really did not want to attend but either felt obligated to go or already committed to because it’d be nice if something good finally came from one of those nights. I hope he doesn’t even come up to me in some cinematic dramatic eyes-meet-across the room cliché type of way. I hope he gets introduced to me and I don’t think a thing of it. Then we start talking and all of a sudden some really obscure topic comes up and it turns out we share an opinion on something that I didn’t even know anyone else on this planet knew about (such as a certain band or in my case an indie movie). For the rest of this initial meeting we just don’t shut up about our similar interests and even disagree on some things but it’ll be so damn attractive to know someone who even has an opposing opinion on this subject. I’ll completely forget all the rules I’ve learned about interacting with the opposite sex – I’ll interrupt him, speak loudly, probably sound too eager, and he’ll mirror me. I won’t even realize I’m attracted to him because I’ll just be so enthralled in whatever the hell it is we’re talking about.

We won’t even exchange numbers or pine or anything. We’ll just continue the conversation. I won’t wonder why he hasn’t texted or what he’s doing or who he’s with because all I care about is watching the movies he suggested and discussing them with him.

One day I’ll be alone and bored and I’ll think of him. I’ll think of him a little more. All of a sudden, he’ll text me as if he read my mind. Again, we’ll defy all the rules about texting we’re supposed to follow. It won’t occur to me that he’s absolutely wonderful because he just is. It’ll make sense for us to become close friends until it makes sense for us to become more. It’ll just happen without the nonsense of decoding this and practicing saying that.

Maybe this is too out there to ever happen and maybe it’s sad that meeting someone and naturally falling into something other than lust is considered too out there. I’ve had my heart broken a fair share of times but not enough to be jaded just yet, so I’ll keep hoping.

I guess you could say I’m ghosting today’s connotations around dating.